UNEDITED
Gemma Alder is used to being the unlucky one in the Alder family: from a nasty rumour about her back in high school to inexplicable mishaps, she seems to be the comical target for unfortunate situations. But if there's one thing she's good...
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Jake
Breaks are the beginning of the end.
At least they usually are. Every break I've ever initiated, which amass to very few considering my heart wouldn't give Gemma up, has led to the end. And I'm sure this break would qualify for the beginning of the end if our relationship hadn't been anything but a play on revenge and built on a tower of lies. I haven't spoken with Gemma for two weeks, let alone seen her. No, wait. That's a lie. I did see her at one of my cafés when I was doing a walk-through with Cassian. She was getting one of her fancy drinks and we caught each other's gaze for a brief second before Cassian ushered me into the backroom to meet with the café manager.
However, as much as her actions have hurt me, I can't help but understand why she wanted to exact revenge on me, why she wanted to embarrass me. Within these two weeks, I've forced myself to really reflect on my own actions. I spent years rethinking what I did in high school, trying to understand the damage I did to Gemma, but I don't think I ever fully understood it until now. I don't think you can fully understand something until it happens to you. And I'm not talking about a rumour spreading or losing control of your bowels because of a laxative. I'm talking about the feeling of betrayal. I trusted Gemma. I fell in love with her again. And...And all this time, she's been playing with my heart like a cat that's cornered a mouse.
Yet despite everything that's happened, I can't prevent myself from admitting that I do miss Gemma. I miss her sassy attitude and her brutal honesty. I miss the dynamics of the relationship between her and Hanna. Even the banter between her and Cassian. I didn't realize, until now, just how much of a role Gemma had started to play in my life.
Tonight, Hanna has her friend, Grace over for a sleepover. They're camping out in the backyard. I think it's silly, considering our backyard doesn't have much privacy, but I suppose it's better than camping in the living room. They've got the propane-fueled campfire out there, along with all the necessities for s'mores. I want to tell the two of them to hold off on the candy before dinner, but I think it's a foolish thing to tell two sixteen-year-old girls. Instead, I turn my attention back to the cedar-plank salmon burgers I'm making. I've never been one to turn to a cookbook before, but I have to admit that Jillian Harris' cookbook is a lifesaver. Each recipe I've made so far has been delicious and Hanna's actually complimented my cooking.
Without saying word, the girls rush through the kitchen and head upstairs. I have no idea what they're doing, but I trust Hanna.
Sighing, I set down the wooden spoon and reach for my bottle of beer, taking a long swig. Cassian's set to come over for dinner tonight and I'm hoping he's smart enough to bring over a twelve pack; I've been running low on the booze these days. Mainly because ever since I bought the tequila for that night at Gemma's house, I haven't been back to the liquor store, but also because I've been using alcohol as a way to compensate for the betrayal that's infected my heart. It's been a single glass of whisky or a bottle of beer every night, sometimes two. It always depends on how susceptible I am to my own emotions that day. I really hope this doesn't label me as an alcoholic, this one-drink-a-night thing.
