Divorce Attorney

Chapter 15: You Made Your Bed, Lie In It

That night I sat on the phone with Christiana, who was not very happy with me at the moment.

"You didn't tell him at all?" She scolded. "Alissa, I told you that you needed to tell him today!"

I sighed down the phone line, "Well now it's almost nine o'clock at night," I stared at the digital clock on my television set box. "What do you want me to do now, call the guy?"
"Absolutely not!" I could almost hear Christiana frowning. "You cannot just tell a man that he is going to be a father through a phone call. That is trashy!"

"But I'm too big of a chicken to do it in person," I huffed.

"Well if you two were grown ups enough to do grown up things in bed, you two can be grown ups enough to have a grown up conversation about what happens now in the aftermath of what you've done," Christiana said matter-of-fact like.

"But-"

"No Buts," she cut me off. "You made your bed, lie in it."

I groaned and begged Christiana to change the subject as she then proceeded to talk to me about the crappy reality television she was currently watching.

I heard a tiny beep indicating I had another call trying to come through. I pulled my phone from my ear and looked at the screen to see Ellis's name and picture appear.

"Christiana, I have to go."

"You're heading over to Justin's to go talk to him?" She laughed.

I smirked, "No way, I'll try to muster up the courage tomorrow. I have to go."

Christiana wished me a goodbye as I picked up Ellis's call just in time.

"Hello?" I answered.

"Hey beautiful," He cheered back to me as he began talking to me about his afternoon after he had left my office. I was only half-listening, the other half of me was zoning out and lost in a big pile of overthinking as I seemed to be doing regularly now. Lost in thought about Justin, lost in thought about our baby, lost in thought about everything.

I bit my lip, already anxious because I didn't want to talk to Ellis about the baby as I could tell he was nearing the subject after wrapping up about his afternoon at work. 

"Anyways," His voice pulled me away from my thoughts. "How was the rest of your afternoon, gorgeous?"

Every nickname he continued to call me just made a pit in my stomach grow larger. I could tell I was not returning the same feelings to Ellis that he was feeling for me.

"Fine," I answered shortly, not going into any further detail because, frankly, there wasn't any further detail. Shortly after Ellis left, I puked again, cried again alone in my office, then went home.

"Just fine?" He tried to pry further.

"Just fine." I confirmed, not allowing him any further digging. 

I could hear him sigh from his end of the phone, obviously a little offended that I wasn't going to divulge any of my inner most thoughts to him. 

"Well I hope your evening is picking up," He returned back to his optimistic mood.

I didn't deserve Ellis. Ellis didn't deserve to be falling for someone who was pregnant with someone else's child. He deserved a woman who could give him their full attention, loyalty, and love. Right now, that wasn't me. Maybe one day it would, but not today.