Shadows of the World » Band of Brothers

15: Everything But Peace

"Why do I find everything but peace?" - Anaïs Nin, from a diary entry featured in Mirages: The Unexpurgated Diary

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Juliette actively avoided the Americans after what had happened in the village that day. She knew she shouldn't really blame them - they knew nothing of the war, really, and had never even seen the front lines, plus they had likely never even met William and thus felt no loyalty towards him. But as friends of Thomas, who was in much the same position, she felt that they might have at least tried to put a stop to it. It didn't sit well with her that that many people could watch what was essentially just a boy be publicly condemned and humiliated and not do anything about it.

Maybe they agreed with the man, she thought. Maybe they secretly thought that Thomas should be serving on the front lines, too, and that Juliette should be a nurse or a Wren or whatever else. But even if they didn't, she wasn't sure she wanted to be associated with people who could just stand by and watch something that hurt her heart so much, no matter how many times she told herself she could understand why they did it. Because the truth was, she couldn't understand. She could see their various reasons, but that didn't mean she understood.

The only American she interacted with was Eugene, who seemed to cross paths with her quite frequently. He still didn't really talk much but he had begun starting conversations as opposed to only speaking when spoken to, and that told her that he had warmed to her. She had never gotten the impression that he disliked her, but she thought that he was just like that; he didn't want to share too much too soon. She could understand that. She thought that she should perhaps try being a bit more like that.

"I heard what happened the other day. What you said to that man," Eugene told her one day when he'd found her in the same field he'd first met her in. He'd seen her and spoken to her in the days since the incident so she wondered whether he really had just found out about it, or whether he had waited until she had cooled down a bit to bring it up. Regardless, she was grateful she'd had time to mull it over before she had to talk about it to a friend of the men she'd reprimanded.

"I suppose you heard what I said to some of your friends afterwards as well then?" she asked quietly after a short pause.

"Yeah."

Juliette nodded and sighed. "I let myself get angry too fast," she admitted. She contributed nothing else.

"Is he a friend of yours? The boy?" Eugene asked after a few moments. He glanced at her once before looking out across the field again, squinting into the early-morning sunlight.

Juliette nodded once more. "Yeah. And he's gotten that before. He doesn't deserve it."

"Does anyone?"

Juliette smiled in spite of herself. Eugene was a gentle man, and she hoped that he, at least, was someone she could take at face value. She didn't get the feeling he saw in her what the others probably did. It made sense to her that he had been picked for a medic; she couldn't imagine him intentionally hurting anyone.

"The men, they..." Eugene began before trailing off, searching for the right words. "Don't be too hard on 'em 'cause of what they did - or didn't do. They mean well." Juliette didn't react, though he knew she'd heard him. "They talk highly of you, you know."

Juliette gave a small, bitter sort of laugh here. "I've met them once, twice in some cases. They don't know me well enough to speak highly of me." And that, oftentimes, was the problem. "They know Henry." She, of course, meant Thomas, but couldn't use his real name. "I bet they speak rather highly of him, and he deserves it, but what if it had been him the other day instead? Would they have stepped in then? Is it about loyalty or is it about morals?"