SPACE ;; TAEGGUK

twenty seven

space is a happy fic 😀👊

;;

fate

was a funny word.

jeongguk didn't know
whether to believe in it
or not, whether to ponder
over giving it the slightest
bit of attention. but after a while
it became crystal clear.

his choice wasn't in
whether to have hope.
it was in working
around it to allow himself
to survive and push
forward against it.
it'd be useless if he
tried to ignore it. a waste
of space and time.

mr kim was intertwined
in his, somewhere. mr kim
remained the centre of his
universe. as far as he let his
teenage brain roam. mr kim,
the centre of his galaxy,
he remained the source of
his light and his warmth and
his happiness, his smiles and
all but as his smiles grew,
his sorrow did too.

the man had better things
to do. every second of the
day he desperately tried to
convince himself to move on
and that his fantasising would
get him nowhere. that taehyung
was his teacher and it was better
to get over him, right now to
avoid anything astronomical.

but with every passing day,
that sliver of hope only grew
more prevalent, an ember in
the ashes that lay, sunken in the
sullen pit of his chest.
with every passing hour,
the embers turned to flickering
flames, till they were fully
ignited under the mere thought
of the man's stare.

jeongguk prayed that he
could reverse time, in hope
that he could escape getting his
heart shattered. he wasn't sure
he could recover from something
so grave and misleading.

was that what taehyung was
doing? misleading him?

no, why would he do
such a thing?

here he was, letting his
insecurities get the most
of him. really, it couldn't be
helped, jeongguk doubted
himself so much to the
point that there wasn't
an ounce of confidence left
in his body when it came
to these matters.

why would anyone
want him anyway? he was
just a small, scrawny teenager
who probably bored the
hell out of the man.

but he didn't.

deep down, somewhere,
jeongguk knew that mr
kim wasn't just messing with
his feelings. unless he was blind.

if he was blind then so be it
because anyone else in his
situation would be blind too.

he wasn't. he wondered
were this would lead.

"thank you, jeongguk."
why was he so formal all
of a sudden, standing on the
doorstep like that. what happened
to 'sweetheart' and 'darling'
and all things in between?
his voice was rough, blunt,
it hurt in ways he hadn't thought
could ever hurt.