epiphany ||| rants

rant 8 (sHouLdErs ArE diStRacTiNg)

It's kind of a thing where girls will say "oh sorry is my shoulder distracting" in response to dress codes and whatnot, and I feel as though many people, mostly boys, probably think we're just exaggerating. Like how can a shoulder be distracting or turn you on?? It's a shoulder, not a sexual organ or anything.

BUT FOR REAL. WE ARE TOLD TO COVER OUR SHOULDERS. AND I JUST WANT TO KNOW WHY.

(Side note: being home all day bc of the coronavirus means being with my family all day every day which means hearing loads of misogynistic, racist, and sexist things, so here is me venting lol)

When I went to my county's health office for some shots, this lovely old nurse took me and my mom to this room where they have the stuff for vaccines and stuff. (I'm wearing a black tank top with thick straps and a flannel over top btw) So the nurse asks me to roll up my sleeves for the shot, but I thought it would be easier to just slide down my sleeve from one shoulder.

Apparently my one shoulder being exposed is wayyy too distracting because the nurse automatically goes "Oh, [insert some male nurse's name here] is working today, we should close the door just in case he walks by."

And my mom agrees with her and is like "oh yes good idea"

And I'm sitting there like ???????

If you think a nurse has problems controlling himself around a teenage girl's bare singular shoulder, maybe you shouldn't be worried about closing the door, you should be worried about your coworker?? Just a thought???

And in high school we weren't allowed to wear any tank tops, but the boys could wear those muscle shirts with the sleeves cut really far down the side so you could literally see their nipples when they leaned over???

Am I the only one who sees an issue?

And another thing, my brothers are allowed to be shirtless and have their underwear showing from their pants, but my mom fusses over my bra strap being slightly visible and barely noticeable when I wear certain shirts???? And I'm not allowed to wear certain shorts because they are too short and I can't wear crop tops because that's too much skin?? But my brothers can take off their shirts and that isn't too much skin??????

Why is it that it is impossible for a boy to show too much skin with his shirt off while a girl gets reprimanded and called a slut if she shows some midriff or a shoulder??? And why does a male's presence mean that I have to cover up my shoulders? Do boys just not have an ounce of self control?

I remember in the fifth grade when I was standing in line to go back inside the school after recess. The kid behind me isn't my friend, he's just a boy in my class who I usually didn't interact much with. So I'm facing forward and stuff and then I feel him snap my bra strap and I spin around and look at him like ummmmm wtf??? And he thought it was the funniest thing ever that he snapped my bra strap because it was slightly showing.

Hello??? I don't snap the band of your underwear so maybe don't snap my bra strap????

After that I was extra careful not to let my bra straps slip or be even somewhat visible to avoid another incident like that. Never once did I think that maybe boys just shouldn't do that? I shouldn't have been so self conscious about my bra straps, he should have just kept his hands to himself.

And what makes boys want to snap bra straps? The fact that they are there??

And my mom hates it when my bra straps show. I'm less self conscious about them now, but my mom absolutely hates it. And it's not like she fixing it when we're out in public or anything, she's pointing it out and demanding I hide them while I'm in my room with just my sister or I'm just lounging around the house. It's like I have to hide the fact that I wear bras because, surprise surprise, I am a woman who has boobs. It's not like that's a huge secret. And if I don't wear a bra under a thick tee shirt around the house, she tells me to put one on.

I don't know. I'm just tired of society telling me that as a woman I need to hide my body.

I mean, I'm modest and stuff, but the way my mom shames other women for wearing clothes that are even slightly revealing or form-fitting disgusts me. She literally says things like:

"she's too heavy to wear leggings"

"her shorts are wayyy too short"

"you can see her bra strap in that shirt"

"her jeans are way too tight"

"she's wearing too much makeup"

"she shouldn't be wearing that, she's too heavy"

"she doesn't have a bikini body"

AND SO MUCH MORE AND I AM JUST SO TIRED OF IT.

WOMEN HAVE BODIES, OKAY?

(Sorry this rant is kinda all over the place but like I said before I am just *clenches fists* tired of all this unnecessary and unhealthy shame society puts on women for just having bodies)