"okay stop," i resigned, letting out a sigh. "what do you want from me? i moved on."he smirked at my resignation before he shook his head, watching me as i glared at him angrily. "chill out, ma. i can see that, and i did too."
i didn't speak, though i didn't understand his purpose in even speaking to me, especially being that he claimed to have moved on too, though i decided not to stress it or think of it any longer.
"how many months?" he asked nonchalantly, using his chin to point towards my stomach, which i didn't even look at as i spoke.
"four."
he nodded his head, though hearing the answer to the question he'd asked seemed to make his energy and entire demeanor shift, and he took a last swig of the hennessy.
"how you been?" he asked calmly, putting the now-empty bottle on the counter, and then leaning beside it on the counter.
i looked down at the leafless tree on my wrist, not bothering to look up at him as i spoke. "just fine, isaiah."
i continued to stare at the tattoo, that's just about entire purpose and meaning stemmed from him, and it's disregard and undesire of attachment came from his abandoning me.
he let out a sigh, before taking some steps towards me and stopping in front of me, before tilting my chin up to force me to look up at him, and staring down at me, the height difference between us quite real.
i pulled my chin away from his gentle hold, narrowing my eyes at him as he looked down at me, with his regular, droopy and red eyes, and sighed, before snaking his arms around my waist.
i heard shuffling, and i stepped back from him, furrowing my eyebrows. "don't touch me."
he let out a frustrated sigh, but followed my commands and took his hold off of me. "when are you gonna get over it? i know what i did, but that was-"
i interjected before he could finish, scrunching up my face. "you embarassed me for months, let me get attached to you and put you before my fucking self, just to walk out on me like always." i snapped, glaring at him angrily, while he looked away from me.
from the look on his face, and the way he shifted himself following my words, i knew he felt defeated under my words of truth, and i took that as my gain before i went on.
"if you moved on, and you're so over me and don't know me, stand on that."
there was a deep moment of silence between the two of us, and he put a hand on the counter beside the two of us before leaning on it heavily and then looking back down at me. "i'm sorry, yo."
i just stared up at him, an unchanging and blank expression on my face, wanting nothing more than for him to walk away and never communicate with me again, because the way his presence and words were tugging at my heart were too much to bare.
"you mean to tell me you don't miss me?" he asked lowly, using his most innocent and gentle voice, one that made me squeeze my eyes shut upon hearing it.
it brought me back to the past, the same past i'd tried to get away from and stay away from for years now, the same past that damn near brought me to my casket, and was almost impossible to pull out of.
it was the same tone of voice he used every time he told me he loved me, or that he missed me or he was sorry, after every time he would take advantage of me and embarrass me deeply.
i opened my eyes and bit my inner lip, grateful there were no voices active in my head to taint my decisions or stress me as we stood, inches apart, and he stared at me with his droopy, yet sad and pleading eyes.
his arms made their way around my waist again, and i stiffened in his touch, feeling my heart pang at the familiarity of this position, though this time i didn't fight his touch or move, rather kept my eyes on him.
all the time and change between the two of us, or rather the change in me, seemed to change so much between our gaze into each others eyes, that seemed to be searching the others for answers.
there were none to be found, though. it was genuinely as if the both of us were staring into the eyes of strangers, and the regular emotions and hidden meanings we could find each others eyes were nowhere to be found.
it was as if his words to the others spoke our souls alive and made them forget each other.
he pulled me even closer, to where our bodies pressed against each other, and lowered his face down to mine, an action that made panic sweep through my body, being that i could, and i was well aware he could, as well, easily feel the baby bump with jahseh's child pressed against his body.
i pulled back from him, swiftly, and just as soon to dodge any contact between us, and i shook my head, gently pushing him away, which filled his eyes and facial expression with hurt, forcing me to look away from him to avoid sharing the hurt feeling.
i shook my head, stepping away from him and picking up the tub of ice cream on the counter, that'd poorly sat there for minutes in this encounter, and i glanced over at him one last time, though i didn't look at his face, but rather down at his shirt.
i knew eye contact would be too much to bare, and i let out a shaky sigh before drawing my attention away from him entirely and looking down at the tub of ice cream in my hands, which was beginning to soften and melt.
"i don't know you."
~
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𝐈𝐍𝐂𝐀𝐑𝐂𝐄𝐑𝐀𝐓𝐄𝐃 - 𝐗𝐗𝐗𝐓𝐄𝐍𝐓𝐀𝐂𝐈𝐎𝐍
Fanfiction"yeah right," she huffed, rolling her eyes. "look at us. we're criminals. psychopaths. we couldn't be together if we wanted to. "