BTS SMERALDO THE NOTES 1 (Edited & Translated)

Yoongi: 25 July Year 22

The Direction Where the Sun Rises
Part 2.2

I opened my eyes again to the sound of a piano. It was silent. Except for the sounds of raindrops falling and leaves rustling. Amidst the silence, the fragile and delicate sound of a piano continued to drift towards me. Someone playing a piano deep in the mountain in the middle of the night? It must be a hallucination. But it continued.

I smirked. It was that same melody I'd tried so hard to remember. That something substantial that was missing, that made me stay up for days on end. Why was it coming to me now, of all times? I concentrated harder, but the melody was barely audible due to the distance and the patter of the rain. I started coughing, which didn't help.

I tried to stand up, but stopped. What would I do now even if I was able to discern the melody? What would change even if I managed to finish the song I'd been working on? I'd never wanted recognition, applause from others, or fame. I never wanted to prove myself to others. Then...what meaning would that song have even if I were to finish it now?

But I continued to pick myself up from the ground and made my way in the direction I heard the music come from. Shivers ran through my body. My face and hands were numb and I couldn't feel my legs either. I felt as if I had no control over my body. But I kept on going. I took one step at a time, slowly making my way towards the music.

Heavy drops of rain struck my head. My shirt was dripping wet. Every joint and muscle screamed with overexertion. My legs shivered so violently I had to stop walking for a moment. My feet slipped on the wet grass and thorny twigs brushed against my shoulders. I was cold to my core. I was so close to collapsing. I slowed down completely. Every step I took with immense struggle, the piano faded.

I found the last bit of strength within me to pick up my pace, desperate to find the source of the music before it stopped entirely. I was so afraid that if I stopped now, I would never be able to find the source of that melody again. I marched forward, unable to discern the path from the forest.

I was struck by low hanging branches then. my knees gave out and I fell to the ground again. I was so out of breath. All my senses came rushing back to me: the cold, fatigue, the strange surroundings deep within the mountain. It was all so vivid.

I carried on. I walked faster. I hit more branches as I went but I didn't care. Soon the sound of the piano grew louder. The more severe my pain grew as I trudged on, the clearer the music got.

I stopped after wandering around in the rain for hours. The melody was more vividly brought to life through my pain. It filled my head in such an overwhelming manner, and intertwined itself with the melody I'd been working on until a few days ago. I put my head in my arms and sank down to the ground again. this melody I was hearing was much closer to a raw emotion than music. It was a flurry of suffering, hope, joy and fear. It was everything I'd tried so hard to get away from.

A memory suddenly popped up then. it was a bright sunny afternoon. I was playing a melody in my workroom, that same melody I was hearing now.

"That sounds really nice," Jungkook said. He came closer to the piano to hear more.

I laughed. "you always say that."

Back then it wasn't a single melody. It was a combination of various memories. From the days I used to playfully pound on the piano keys as a child. From the days my friends danced in sync with my performance in the classroom/storage room. From the days when I stayed up all night writing pieces and inhaled fresh morning air.

My piano had been with me in every happy moment in my life. These happy memories always ended up being shattered into pieces. But those memories couldn't be forgotten. 

So what would it mean to finish this piece of music? I still didn't know the answer. but there was something that preceded this question and answer. I wanted to capture all this before it scattered into the air. It wasn't to please anyone or to prove something. It wasn't even for myself. I just wanted to capture this emotion: the pain and the fear, with this piece of music. It didn't have to signal the beginning of something. It didn't have to have a meaning. I just wanted to finish it.

I couldn't hear the piano anymore. The rain was beginning to stop. My body was still shaking uncontrollably from the cold. I closed my eyes and allowed myself to notice everything around me more vividly. The raindrops on my cheeks, that splashed onto the ground, flowed into a stream, the chilly wind, the smell of soil, the leaves rustling, the way I breathed.

When I finally got up from the ground again, I noticed the sign ahead of me. "Mineral Spring ahead".

I thought I'd roamed deep into the mountain, but I was back where I'd started. Ahead was a fork in the mountain paths.

I decided to head East, in the direction where the sun rises.

ｖｏｔｅ
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ｓｈａｒｅ