Noncandescent

The Breaking Point

Later, Eddie’s in the firehouse gym, doing his usual routine, until he feels like he’s going to pass out if he doesn’t stop for a water break.

Next to him, Bobby’s stopped lifting weights as well, so Eddie decides now’s as good a time as any to speak up.

“Bobby, it’s just not working anymore. How is it that people call me a hero when I’m wearing the uniform, but at home it’s like I don’t even exist?”

Bobby nods, “Has to be hard.”

Eddie asks, “What do you think I should do?”

Bobby tries to be helpful, “Well, maybe it’s not the marriage that’s the problem. Maybe you two just aren’t on the same page.”

This confuses Eddie, “What the hell does that mean?”

After looking around to somewhere behind them, Bobby says, “See that treadmill? It may not be broken, but if you don’t know how it works, it doesn’t make a difference.”

Eddie’s still confused, “What, you think we need marriage counseling?”

Bobby laughs, “No, it’s more like everyone does.”

Eddie’s shaking his head, “No way. I’m not talking to a complete stranger about my private life.”

Bobby backs off, “Fine. Buck doesn’t need to respect you. But just remember any marriage is like a plant. You put the work in, it’s amazing. If not, it’s just gonna die.”

That makes sense to Eddie, “Where’d you hear that?”

Bobby laughs, “Counseling.”

Eddie throws his empty bottle at Bobby, but doesn’t say anything.

That night, when Eddie finally comes home, there’s a cupcake on the counter, along with an empty pizza box and a dirty plate. Pissed, Eddie puts the cupcake in the fridge, looking for food.

Then Buck shows up out of nowhere, “Eddie what the hell are you doing?”

Eddie explains calmly, “Seeing how you didn’t save me any pizza, I’m fending for myself.”

Buck argues, “I just put that cupcake out, and I was coming back for it. Now it’s gonna be all hard.”

“Well I don’t need to attract ants. Did you clear this whole kitchen out or what?” Eddie snaps, looking through the cupboards.

“I assumed you were eating at the fire station.” Buck admits sheepishly.

At that, Eddie slams the cupboard shut again. “Does it even occur to you that there’s three people in this house, all of which need to eat, and one of them is a growing boy?”

Buck tries to defend himself, “You know something, Eddie, if we were communicating like we used to, maybe there’d be something in here.”

Eddie slams the cupboards again, stomping towards Buck. “Why exactly is it we’re back to you being so exhausting?”

Buck rolls his eyes, “Oh that’s rich. I’m exhausting, when I’m practically the only one who sees Chris anymore, making sure he comes first, while you’re off doing God knows what.”

Eddie can’t let that go, “Excuse me? I’m the one out there putting my life on the line on double shifts so we can pay off the mortgage, and for both our cars.”

Buck fires back, “Which is all you do. Meanwhile you got me taking care of the bills on my significantly smaller salary, now that I'm not taking as many shifts to be there for Chris.”

Eddie reminds him, “Which you said you were okay with. You said it was fair. What, you don’t want to live here anymore? Don’t want the car?”

Buck tries to steer it back, “Eddie, who makes sure this house isn’t falling apart so our kid doesn't get hurt? Me. Who does everyone’s laundry? Me. Who buys the groceries? Me. Not to mention I’m with my sister and Chim every weekend to help with their baby, even sometimes bringing Chris so they can play together. You’re putting all this pressure on me, and while all you seem to care about anymore is yourself.”

That hits a nerve, “Okay, you don’t know what the hell you’re talking about. You want to talk about pressure? You know damn well I don’t just put out fires because I only care about myself. Or get up at the butt crack of dawn for a car wreck. Or pull a crippled kid’s body out of the water, praying to whoever’s listening it’s not Chris. You know better than anyone what I go through. Or does the tsunami not mean anything to you anymore?”

That really hurts, but Buck can’t focus on that, “Right, and the second you get home, it’s straight to the couch to watch TV, or on your computer.”

Then Buck decides he’s done, “You know what? If that’s how you get your rocks off, you go right ahead. I refuse to even try to compete with it.” and starts to walk away.

Eddie can’t resist getting one more jab in, “Well we all know it sure as hell isn’t you.”

Which makes Buck turn back around, “And it’s not going to be! Because you care more about restoring that stupid car and relaxing on the couch than you do about our family.”

And that’s when Eddie finally loses it, advancing on Buck. “Just shut the hell up! I am sick and tired of all your stupid nagging. You selfish, disrespectful, ungrateful asshole! How dare you say that about me, the man you married? You never let up, and you take whatever energy I have left, and I just can’t do it anymore.”

At this point, Eddie’s got Buck backed into a corner, as he keeps yelling, “I’m done. You hear me? If you can’t treat me with the respect I deserve--no don’t you dare look away. Look at me!” Eddie snaps, when Buck tries to do just that, “then why are we even married at all?”

Buck’s almost in tears by this point, shaking his head, barely whispering, “I don’t know anymore.”

Eddie finally backs away, but then he hears from behind him, “I can’t be your husband anymore. I just can’t.”

If Eddie thought he was pissed before, that’s nothing compared to how he feels when he hears that.

Eddie gets back in Buck’s face, “If you want a divorce so damn bad, then you go right ahead and do it!”

Then he finally leaves the room, leaving Buck struggling to not cry.

How the hell did things go so wrong so fast?

Eddie’s vibrating with anger as he makes it to the driveway, so when he sees a trash can, he kicks it. When it falls over, he picks it up, not caring if trash falls out, and throws it against the house.

Only, before he can do it again, he sees someone watching him from across the street.

Somehow, this calms him down enough to where he gives a sheepish wave, then goes about picking all the trash back up, still pissed, but at least he doesn’t feel like hitting something anymore.

Inside, Buck goes to the guest bedroom, looking at his ring for several long moments before finally slowly sliding it off, unable to believe this is where they are now.

Then, with a finality he wishes more than anything wasn’t real, he throws the ring in a spare drawer, and goes to bed.

Meanwhile, Eddie finally comes back inside, marches straight to his bedroom, where he knows Buck won’t be, throws his shoes off, and slams the door shut.

Perfect ending to a perfect day.