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I woke up hugging a pillow tightly. 2:00 am ang oras nang mapatingin ako sa wall clock na nasa kwarto ko. I saw Mom in my dream. Kumuha ako ng sweater at lumabas para puntahan si Dad. Tuwing napapaniginipan ko si Mom, hindi ako nakakatulog pag hindi ako nagpapakwento kay Dad about sa kanya. 8 years old pa lang ako nong nawala si Mom sa amin at hindi ko sya masyadong maalala. At naniniwala akong lost memories yung mga napapaniginipan ko about sa kanya, kailangan ko lang ipaconfirm kay Dad.

Huminto ako sa pintuan ng master's bedroom. I softly knocked the door and opened it after couple of seconds. A soft smile appeared on my lips ng makita ko silang magkayap na natutulog. Nilapitan ko si Dad at tinapik ng mahina ang balikat nito, nagmana ako kay Dad kaya alam kong magigising din ito kaagad. Slowly, he opened his eyes.

"Princess?" Sabi nito sa mahinang boses at dahan-dahang inalis ang pagkakayakap nila sa isa't-isa.

Ngiti ang ibinigay ko kay Dad hanggang sa umupo ito sa gilid ng kama.

"What's the matter?" 

"Mom visited my dream." I whispered.

"Tara sa baba, pinagod ko ang Mama mo, kelangan nyang magpahinga."

I glared at Dad nang mag-sink in sa akin ang ibig nitong sabihin.

Pinanood ko naman itong kumutan si Mama at hinalikan ito sa noo bago nya ako inakbayan at iginaya palabas, pababa sa kusina.

"Dad? Do you still miss Mom?" Tanong ko dito habang pinapanood itong magtimpla ng dalawang basong gatas. Habang ako naman ay nakaupo sa isang stool.

"Yes, everyday."  Sabi nito at saka inabot ang isang basong gatas sa akin.

"I miss her everyday too even though I don't remember her well." Nahihiya kong sabi. Blurred ang iba kong memories about Mom, siguro dahil bata pa talaga ako noon, honestly, if it weren't for the pictures, I won't remember her face.

Inabot ni Dad yung kamay ko and caressed it.

"Hey, it's okay, your Mom would understand. So tell me about the dream."

"Well, she's very happy in my dream, she brushes my hair and dressed me up. She will play with me till I'll be hungry then I'll watched her prepare our snacks. Then, she tucked me in my bed for an afternoon nap, helped me sleep while brushing my hair with her fingers and humming a song softly." I happily said. I am aware that the smile on my lips is getting wider and wider while remembering my dream. But I felt Dad's other hand wiping my cheeks.

"She definitely did that." He said while giving me a warm smile.

"You're our Princess and I remember her being excited when she learned that our second baby is a girl. She always wanted a baby girl, she wanted to spoil you." Dad chuckled while reminiscing. Then he continue.

"She even bought bunch of clothes even if you're still one month old and it still doesn't fit on you. Your Mom really likes dressing up, you know,  and she wanted you to get that from her. Well, she predicted well. "

Lumipat si Dad ng upo sa tabi ko at sumimsim sa gatas nito, before talking about Mom again.

"She spoiled you too much to the point na kahit may sarili ka ng kwarto, gusto ka nyang parating katabi matulog, kaya sa kwarto ka na namin natutulog ever since." Dad looked at me and grin before saying...

"Kaya nga di ka namin nasundan dahil andoon ka parati sa kwarto namin at namana mo pa yung pagiging madaling magising sa akin, tuloy di ako makasccore."

"Seriously Dad? Is that even necessary?" I snorted.

"Anyways, you might not remember this but your Mom was your first bestfriend. " Napatingin ako kay Dad dahil lumungkot bigla ang boses nito.

"And as much I like that idea, I don't want her to be your last  bestfriend Princess, your Mom will be sad if she'll knew that you don't make friends, real friends."

"I got you and Kuya..." 

"That's nice but friend or friends are different stories."

Pilit na ngiti ang naisukli ko dito.

"I don't know Dad, I did made a friend during first grade, but I lost him, same as Mom, I feel like if I got friends, or someone I can opened up to, I might lose them as well."

Dad shook his head and Kuya entered the kitchen.

"Then why did you opened up to someone you just met online and in just few days?"

That caught me off guard. Even I questioning myself on why did I did that.

"I don't really know, he's worthy to talk to, I guess?" 

"Inlove ka ba, Princess?" Sabi pa nito ng may nanunudyong tingin.

"What nonsense are you talking about? You said it yourself that we just met. Why are you here anyways?" I asked clearly annoyed, but he just shrugged and Dad on the side is just laughing.

"I just asked, because it's very unlike you." He said while waving a bottled water like he's answering my last question.

"What's very unlike me?" 

"Well, you only tell about your day with me and Dad then this guy? What's with him?"

"Maybe I'm exploring?" I shrugged.

"I don't really know, Kuya, get out of here."

He made a face and said good night to Dad before leaving. Then I faced Dad.

"What's with him Dad? Is he sleep talking?" Dad chuckled.

"Don't know, but I have to agree with him, it's very unlike you. What's him name again?"

It's been exactly five days since we chatted. And I talked Kuya and Dad about him a lot but I forgot to tell them his  name.

"Kieffer. Kieffer Manalo."

Inubos ko yung gatas and asked Dad about the friend I made during first grade that I suddenly remembered.

"Dad? Ano palang nangyare sa naging kaibigan ko nong first grade? I remember that you and his parents were colleagues."

"The last news that I've heard about them was his parents died in a plane crash one year before your Mom passed away. I didn't hear about the kid but maybe he was raised by their relatives."

And all I did was to nod. I wonder where he is now. I don't remember his name tho' and asked Dad about it.

"What's his name anyway? I can't remember his name."

"I think it's like Wayne... Bautista, ah! It's Dwayne Bautista."

Yeah. Dwayne. Dwayne Bautista.

"Come on Princess, it's getting late. You need to get some sleep more."

Nagpaubaya naman ako kay Dad. Inilagay nito ang mga pinag-inuman namin sa lababo at sabay kaming umakyat at naghiwalay lang upang pumasok sa kanya-kanya naming kwarto after we said good night.

~Gab~

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