AWITL Social Media

27

(Whatsapp)
(Subject: Pedophile)

Akali: hey, guys. I got a question.

Ahri: a question?

Tiara: what could be so important that you're messaging the group to ask about?

Akali: how do I put this?

Akali: is Grey a pedophile?

Grey: I'm sorry, what!?

Ahri: O_O

Tiara: WTF!!!

Brite: what kind of question is that?

Nidalee: who would even ask that in a groupchat.

Tiara: you better explain why you called my brother a pedophile.

Grey: yes, please explain.

Akali: it's because of Ahri.

Grey: Ahri! What lies have you been spreading about me!?

Ahri: nothing!

Ahri: nothing about you being a pedophile at least!

Sona: that's not helping your case, dumbass.

Grey: yeah, I'm going to have to ask you about that later.

Solas: can we let Akali answer?

Akali: well, Ahri and Grey are dating.

Ahri: and if I as much as smell your scent on him I'll skin you alive.

Grey: I'm actually touched.

Sona: No promises.

Nidalee: ^^

Tiara: considering how Ahri acts, Grey should be the one worried that she might cheat on him.

Akali: Grey is over a hundred years old. And Ahri is like what, 28.

Ahri: I'm not exactly sure, but I guess that's pretty close to being right.

Tiara: how can you not know your own age?

Ahri: probably because I was a fox most of my life.

Tiara: oh yeah.

Tiara: I always forget about that.

Brite: back to Grey being a pedophile.

Grey: I'm not a pedophile!!! And why did you say all that stuff, Akali?!?!

Akali: well, considering how old Ahri and Grey are, Grey is dating someone who isn't one third from his age.

Akali: doesn't that make you a pedophile?

Nidalee: she does have a point.

Brite: now you got it all mixed up.

Akali: what?

Tiara: Grey might be over a hundred years old but in undead years he's still considered really young.

Grey: that's true.

Grey: in fact, I'm not even considered a teenage undead yet.

Tiara: so in other words, Grey isn't a pedophile, but Ahri is a pedophile who is dating a still child undead.

Ahri: what!?!?

Akali: that's good.

Akali: I just wanted to know which was the pedophile in the relationship.

Ahri: WTF!!!!

Nidalee: I expected better from you, Ahri.

Sona: I didn't.

Tiara: ^^

Brite: taking advantage of a still child undead.

Solas: Truly despicable.

Tiara: I guess those rumors about you being a wh*re were underestimating you. You're also a pedophile to add to the list of things you are.

Ahri: what the f*ck is wrong with you people?! I'm not a pedophile!!!!

Tiara: seeing as you're dating Grey, I don't believe you.

Akali: hey! Hey! Hey! Leave her alone.

Ahri: thank you, Akali.

Akali: everyone is free in the Institute of War, as long as we keep our children away from this pedophile, everyone should be fine.

Ahri: f*ck you, Akali.

Nidalee: I'm going to start keeping Annie away from you.

Ahri: what!?!? You can't do that!!!!

Grey: sorry, Ahri, but she has a point. Annie should spend less time with you.

Ahri: Grey!! You traitor!!! You're supposed to be my boyfriend!!!

Grey: I Am.

Grey: which is why I don't want you to end up raping a child.

Sona: seeing as she f*cks you, I'd say that already happened.

Brite: she has a point.

Tiara: ^^

Ahri: you people are jerks!!!

Ahri: cyber bullying is a thing and I refuse to be a victim of it!!!!!

Ahri: also, Tiara is dating Solas. There are thousands of years between them, not to mention she's as old as Grey, that makes Solas in the same boat as me!

Tiara: ha!

Tiara: no it doesn't.

Ahri: WHY?!?!?

Solas: since both me and Tiara are related to the gods, this age business doesn't apply to us.

Brite: that's actually true.

Tiara: in fact, Solas could have been dating me when I was 10 and literally no one would give a f*ck.

Nidalee: damn, you gods have lots of perks.

Ahri: so why doesn't that apply to Grey?!?!?

Ahri: he's the new Ionian God of blood.

Ahri: also, aren't Lords of Cinder gods to your world!?!?

Grey: Ahri, calm down. We were kidding.

Grey: you didn't actually believe we think that you are a pedophile, did you.

Ahri: and you!!! You're the worst!!!

Ahri: you're supposed to be my boyfriend!! But instead of backing me up, you decide to join them in some cruel joke?!?

Grey: whether I say yes or no you'll be mad.

Ahri: you're damn right I'll be mad!!!!!!!!

Ahri: you're sleeping on the couch, without a pillow, blanket, or even Silver.

Grey: so you're saying, that you don't want the buckets of chocolate sundae and newest video games that I bought for you as an apology?

Ahri: our door is unlocked, I'm alone in the bed, and my clothes are all over the floor. OwO

Ahri: don't make me wait.

Tiara: that is more than I ever needed or wanted to know.