saudade || Hanse FF

Ⅱ

"How does it feel to be such a successful young author?" the tv-host is looking at the girl that is sitting in front of her, the girl has her black hair hanging loose and she has a bright smile on her face "I never thought in the three years that I'm here that I would publish a book, it feels unreal" she says. The host smiles and applauds for her softly "You moved here after finishing school in Korea, how did that feel?" the audience is looking at the pair, there are cameras everywhere and they are all pointed at them. "It was weird leaving everyone behind I cared about" she bites her lip as the thought of her best friend and ex-boyfriend fill her head, she still misses him everyday but she can't do anything about it.
A sigh leaves the girl her lips, she is looking at herself in the mirror, the staff is reapplying her make up so she can get back out there in a bit. "Are you okay?" the host is standing near her. She has a soft smile on her face. "I saw it was a hard topic for you, I'm sorry Yoonsun" she smiles as she sits beside her, the girl shakes her head "It's okay Alyssa, it is your job to ask and my job to answer" she shoots her a smile filled with pain but understanding. "You have been one of the kindest celebrities I got on this show, do you know that?" Alyssa smiles, she is a bit older than Yoonsun, maybe hitting the thirty but still looking young. Yoonsun chuckles and shakes her head "You are just saying that to make me feel better about myself."

"Yoonsun" the black-haired girl turns around, her mother is standing there with a strict face "We have to go" the girl sighs and walks towards her "Can't you give me one break in my life? I just finished a long interview and you want me to hop right in to the other one?" she knows she shouldn't have picked her mother as a manager but she didn't had much of a choice, after her father died her mother needed work and what better way to still control your daughter's life and make choices about her career.
Yoonsun is looking at her phone, she still has his number, but she doesn't know if he still uses it. "Are you thinking about him again?" Her mother looks at her daughter with a disgusted look, she never liked the boy, he was too edgy for her liking. While her daughter was classy and sophisticated. "It's been three years Yoonsun, let the past rest" her mother says, a deep sigh rolls over her lips and her eyes go to her mother "It is your fault, this is all your fault! I never wanted to leave Korea!" tears are starting to form in Yoonsun her eyes. She never adapted to her life here in the United States, she couldn't just let go of all her friends back in Korea. She didn't have much but the ones she had were close and good friends, especially Hanse and his members. They cared about her as much as she cared about them, they always hung out.

Her mother parks the car and as soon as they stand still Yoonsun gets out and runs in the house, she doesn't feel like talking to her mother at all. "Yoonsun!" her mother calls after her but she isn't listening, she just wants to get in bed and hide under the covers.

Soft music is filling the room, Yoonsun has her feet against the wall as she is laying with her back on the bed, she has her eyes closed and let the music sink in. "I wish my life was as calm as this song" she whispers, her door flies open and her mother is standing in the opening "Open your eyes, you have work to do."
Yoonsun gets up from her bed and she looks at her mom "What work?" she walks to her desk and she sits down, not giving her mom a single look. "You have to finish the last two chapters of your book so we can send it to the publisher so they can read it over again" her mother walks towards her "I know mom and I already started working on it" she opens her laptop. "Look at me Yoonsun, you need to take this seriously" Yoonsun stands up and looks at her mother "Don't you think I know that?! I want this even more than you, but you are the one that is forcing me to do it which takes out all the fun!" she yells, tears are forming in her eyes. When they left for the United States the bond between Yoonsun and her mother became worse, Yoonsun blamed her for having to leave Hanse behind. Not only that but her mother got more stressed, she had to take care of everything herself. Her father took care of basically everything and after his passing suddenly her mother had to do everything, her mother didn't let Yoonsun mourn, she started letting Yoonsun work harder on her stories so she could send them in.

A sigh leaves Yoonsun her lips, she looks at her screen with a sigh, she is nearing the end of her final chapter, but she doesn't know how to end it. Her gaze towards the pictures behind her laptop and a smile appears on her face, it's pictures of her and Hanse but also of her and him with his friends, ideas jump up in her head and she starts typing away on her laptop. She finally has the perfect ending in her head for the book, she will finally finish her third book.
Yoonsun presses send and a smile is on her lips, she finally send her book to her publicist. "Hanse, I wish you could read my books, I wish you were here with me for this journey like I was with yours" she whispers to herself, she closes her laptop and let her head rest on it "I'm sorry I left you Hanse."