The Caged Bird Longs To Be Free

Chapter 3

You meet by pure accident the next day.

You see him with a few friends on their bikes, heading to the park with a rugby ball.

He sees you and stops. You practically sprint towards him.

When he realises you are there he breaks into a smile.

"Hey, we're about to go play some rugby in the park. Want to join?"

"Sure, sounds fun."

He motions to the handlebars of his bike. You precariously balance yourself on the front as he starts pedaling again.

You would have enjoyed being behind him, hands wrapped around his waist, but this is the second best thing.

Until humans learn how to grow wings, or scientists invent the jetpack, this is the closest we will ever get to flying. You hear David laugh when you extend your arms out, as if trying to catch the air under your triceps and take off.

You spend the next few hours throwing and kicking the ball between the four of you.

It has been a while since you played rugby, having been drafted into a weekend team when you were ten years old, but then left after the boys gave you a kicking for being, quote, "an AIDS-carrier".

You try to maintain that it was your choice to play, but have no doubt that someone else in your family wanted you to toughen up a bit.

Your skinny size didn't change at all during your time spent at rugby and did nothing to stop the continual kicking you would receive at break time either.

But looking back on it that the time when you were in the park, it was worth it.

If you didn't know how to kick a rugby ball, you wouldn't have met him and wouldn't have found someone to spend time with in the long summer days and short hot nights.

David's friends were Ollie and Jack.

They were proper rugby lads, built like brick outhouses and about as charismatic. But David's constant compliments and encouragement kept you going.

"Nice shot! Good throw! Why did you give up rugby? You are excellent!"

You thought it was all going well, until Ollie spoke up.

What school did you say you went to again?"

"Abbey Mill."

Ollie's eyes widen in recognition.

"I thought I knew you. You're that fag boy that was outed on TattleTale."

It feels like you've been punched in the chest.

TattleTale. The social media site where anyone can anonymously upload statuses, pictures, or videos. No accountability, no verification.

Your first run-in with the site was following your argument with John at the start of the school year.

It was contained first to your form group, then to your school year, then somehow to the entire school, and then beyond to the Internet.

The obvious embellishments started almost immediately. All those messages with words like 'fag' and 'queer'...

And this is why you never took quickly to a label. Because it has only ever locked you in and never set you free.

Just like now.

"I thought I knew you. You're that fag boy that was outed on TattleTale."

Your cheeks burn from embarrassment.

But then David jumps in.

"Don't say THAT word."

"Why not? It's what he is."

"No it isn't. He's a guy. Just like us. There is nothing bad about him. Hell, we were just playing rugby with him."

Jack speaks aloud.

"I never thought fags would be good at rugby."

"Nah, it's the opposite," Ollie replies. "They love grabbing other guys around the shorts."

You mumble something about heading home but David stops you.

"No, these guys should leave, you shouldn't have to go."

You wish that had happened.

Instead David just stood there like a statue as his friends berated you, eventually leaving of their own accord soon after.

Only then did he come over and check you were okay. For a second, you hate him. You truly despise him.

But then you look into his jungle green eyes and count the freckles along the bridge of his nose...and he is back making your stomach do somersaults.

That should be it. You should have guessed how things would go after this.

Sure, he asks if you're okay afterwards and walks home with you, but his silence indicates just as much as the other two throwing epithets at you.

You stayed...and set yourself up for a fall.

You were just suckered in by his body and his mind and didn't think what the outcome might be.

As you reach your house David throws a question out.

"Do you want to go to the pub tonight? You've got your license, right? So you won't have any trouble getting in?"

You immediately say 'yes', before realising you already have plans.

"Joey, he's having a party at his house tonight since his parents are out of town. I'll text him to ask if you can come along."

David tries to protest but you remind him that he brought up wanting to go for a drink, so he finally relents.

Joey pings back a minute later.

Joey: Sure you can bring your date along.

Me: He's not my date.

Joey: Come off it, we all know you like him.

Joey: And he likes you back.

Me: He's a total straight lad.

Joey: I can tell when someone likes another...like that.

Joey: And he is hot for you.

Joey: But if you don't want him, can I take a crack?

Me: Most definitely not!

Joey: Aha! Why so defensive if he means nothing?

Me: This convo is over.

Me: I'll see you tonight.

Joey: Ping me when you are on your way.

Me: Will do.

You look up from your phone.

"He says you can come along."

"Nice," David replies. "I'll meet you here then?"

"Yep, half eight."

"Cool, See you then."