Something More [The Avengers: 1]

The Mandarin [11]

The morning sun shone in my eyes as I stared up at the ceiling. My mind ran through the events of last night. We made it back to the house late in the evening, settled down to watch a movie, and then kissed goodnight as we went towards our separate rooms. Of course, one kiss wasn't going to change everything, I knew that. Baby steps were something that we both needed, and I was alright with that. If this was something we were both committed to, I didn't want to ruin it by rushing into anything. As my mind drifted, I remembered one of my last conversations with Bucky, before that fateful mission.

"What are you going to do after we get rid of Hydra?" Bucky asked me, a drink in his hand. I had a drink in my own, although I knew it did nothing for me. It was  cold, as it normally was in December. We made one stop in London before our mission to capture Zola, and the team was drinking to celebrate the near-end of the war.

"Go back home," I replied easily, taking a small sip. Bucky looked at me from the corner of his eye, but I didn't dare look back at him.

"As soon as I get home, I'm going dancing," Bucky told me. "You up for it, pal?"

I let out a sigh. "I'd rather not go dancing. Especially with some dame."

"What, you'd rather go dancing with a guy?" Bucky asked in a joking manner. My ears reddened and I glanced around the bar, making sure no one was paying attention to our conversation. Bucky took notice of my silence, his eyes widening. "Steve, don't tell me you-"

"Don't say it," I begged. I couldn't take it if my best friend called me a fag. My eyes brimmed with tears at the thought.

"You know it's illegal," Bucky muttered, staring directly at me.

"I know," I whispered back, lowering my head. "If you want nothing to do with me after this, I get it. Just help me on this last mission and you'll never see me again."

"I never said that," Bucky replied. I didn't look up, still ashamed. "Hey," Bucky tapped under my chin, causing me to look up, "I'm with you 'til the end of the line, pal." He smiled at me, and my heart fluttered in my chest as I smiled back. "As soon as we finish this mission, me and you are coming back to this very bar and having a long conversation."

"You bet we are," I replied with a small smile, taking a drink of my beer.

A knock interrupted my thoughts. I stood, opening the door and smiling as Tony greeted me. He wore a smile that soon fell as he took in my face. "Hey, what's wrong?"

"What?" I brushed a hand against my face and found it wet, no doubt tears I hadn't realized I'd been crying. Oh. "I'm sorry, I was just thinking about back then. It just, I can't help... my mind just wanders."

"Hey, that's okay. Was it about him?" I nodded sadly, looking at the floor. "That's alright, I needed to talk to you, anyways."

My heart beat faltered. "Oh?"