Dragon Witch ✔️

56 - Goodbyes

We had one last stop before we could head home--the potionology building. Nissa raided the potion vending machines in the lobby while I worked on something in one of the smaller potion labs. It was hard to read the ingredient list because my eyes kept welling up.

"What are you making?"

I jumped as Nissa spoke at my shoulder. "Oh, it's just a-" I couldn't say it. In my mind, I could hear Eva's plaintive apologies. She would never let me do this if she could stop me.

Nissa leaned around me to read the potion recipe book. She shook her head.

"You think this is the best idea? If we survive, don't you want everything to go back to normal?"

"Of course I do." I stirred the potion, watching its purple depths bubble. "But it can't. I'm a changeling, you're a shade. Nothing can ever be the same again."

She punched me in the arm. "Not if you talk like that. Don't take the potion. Bring it with you if you have to, and take it when you need it. Just don't take it now."

Maybe she was right. If I took this potion and severed my bond with Eva, it would cause mental scarring. I might never be able to bond with a familiar again. Only, it wasn't that simple.

"You don't get it. If I die and we're still bonded, it could kill her."

Nissa rolled her eyes. "If you spend more time trying not to die and less time worrying about other people dying, then you won't have a problem."

I finished up the potion anyway. Once it was done and sloshing safely in a reinforced thickly-wrapped glass vial, I tucked it away in the backpack Nissa had picked out for me. We checked out our gear, and she dropped me off at home.

As I walked in the front doors, Mom came out of the kitchen. She paused in the doorway, looking like she couldn't decide whether to go back in the kitchen or hurry past me. Even after she'd tried to get me to go to Rothworths and give up magic entirely, I couldn't feel angry. Not tonight. This might be the last time I saw her.

I crossed the entry hall and hugged her. She was a little shorter than me, and her bony shoulders dug into my upper arms as she lightly hugged me back.

"What's this for?" she asked, sounding a little suspicious.

I let her go. "I love you. And I'm sorry." Rubbing my eyes, I kept my gaze on my shoes. "I'm sorry for lying. I shouldn't have, I just didn't want you to hate me. Because I can't give up magic. I can't. It's part of me, Mom. It's in my blood."

She took me in her arms and squeezed me tight. "Oh, sweetie, I don't hate you. I could never hate you. I'm worried for you, that's all." She sighed. "Magic is so dangerous. I've always thought it kills people."

I stiffened, wanting to argue, even though I knew I would regret it. Mom cut me off before I could say anything. She let me go and put her hands on her hips.

"I've been talking to your grandmother." Shaking her head, she let out a short laugh. "'Arguing' is more like it. She's told me over and over that magic doesn't make people do anything, that it's just a tool, and..." She wiped a tear from the corner of her eye. "I wish I could believe her, but you've changed, Lilly. In the last few months, you've gone from my little girl to a-"

I braced myself for "pain in the rear," "menace," or "monster."

She smiled. "You're becoming a social young woman. I can't remember the last time you brought a friend home, much less two. Not to mention that Otherworlder you're hanging around. I can't say I approve, but you look so happy when you're with him. You never looked that happy in Chicago."