Love Or Hate

Trying

There are times in life when your heart and mind are at war. The fight can be for so many reasons, but for Roxas it was Sora. He wanted to tell him so many things but his brain got in the way. His mind kept on thinking of "what if" or "this is not gonna end up well" and stop him from speaking what he felt.

This problem of his had gotten so bad he wasn't even able to say hi to Sora. In all he was miserable.

"Wow, you look horrible" Xion said as she sat next to her best friend. Roxas hadn't even notice when she got to his house but he didn't even care.

"I'm sick"the blond was curled up on his sofa.

"With what?"

"Puppy love" and Roxas proceeded on telling his friend what happen with Sora and what he did.

Xion looked at him with a serious expression and said "You are a total idiot"

Roxas wasn't surprised, he had it coming."I know, I couldn't keep my cool. I do stupid things when I panic" he didn't know how Sora could be so honest with his feelings.

"You need to tell him how you feel! He took a leap of fate for you!"

He wanted to tell his crush but as soon as the thought came to his mind all the anxiety and fear came to him "But I know that I'll do it again! I'm gonna lose all nerve, panic and do a dumb thing. Or what if I say something stupid and freak him out? What if-"

Xion stop him by putting duck tape on his mouth. She loved her friend but he could be very exasperating "You can't let all those what ifs stop you, because you might end up regretting not telling him now"

"Ok" Roxas knew Xion was right, she was always right.

Xion's phone started ringing , she was planing on ignoring it but she notice it was Axel's number.

"Hello?"she answer it "Wow Kairi? .... Calm down..... No........ " she looked at Roxas with a worry expression "I'm with him.... Ok.. We'll help too... Ok bye"

"What?"

"Sora has gone missing" Xion said worry.

"What!" Roxas was hit with so many emotions all at once. Fear, worry, uneasiness, mixed all with a bit of regret. Why would sora even do something like that? He couldn't imagine.

"His parents say he ran away from home, they've been looking everywhere for him since yesterday, but they haven't found him"

Roxas doudted Sora would just run away like that, which meant he was hiding. The problem was where?? Where?... He mentally kick himself. Of course the only place Sora would be is his secret place. "No, not everywhere."

"Wait, you know where he is?"

"Maybe I'll call you if I find him" with that said he grab his keys and some money then left.

------

At first Sora just wanted to be alone, now he just wanted to be found. He felt lonely, sad and hungry.

"Who am I kidding? No ones gonna find me here" he was in distress.

With his head busy with thoughts Sora barely notice the blond boy trip at the entrance of the tunnel and fall right on his face.

"Roxas?" Sora was a bit surprise that he had found him.

You see Roxas had run to catch a train, bought food for the brunet, and spend about an hour trying to figure out where the entrance to the beach was, just to fall face down to a pile of sand. His worry had turn from annoyance to anger.

To let it all out he started to rant " You! Do you know how many people have been looking for you!? And how worry they are!? Next time could you not hide close to sand."

"Who says I want to be found? What are you doing here anyways? It's not like you care. Wasn't I just a problem for you? I thought you'll be celebrating that I was gone" Sora didn't mean it but he was just so bitter and sad, he let it out on Roxas.

"Yeah you are right, I don't care about you" ouch, that hurt Sora, even if the blond sounded sarcastic, still he had that one coming for what he said. "That's why I didn't worry if you had eaten or not, that's why I didn't just spend an hour looking for that damn tunnel, that's why I didn't run all the way here regretting not telling you how much I like you. Yeah, you are absolutely right, why am I even here, I should just go. To top it all there's sand in my mouth" this was no good, Roxas could feel a knot growing on his throat. He decided to leave before Sora could realize how hurt he was.

Meanwhile the brunet felt guilty, all the negative feeling we're starting to fade "I'm sorry, please stay. I know you care and I like you too"

"Did you just say 'too'? Why?" Roxas was starting to panic. He hadn't notice he kinda confess to Sora in the middle of his rant.

" hahahaha I don't believe you hahahaha wow hahaha" the brunet's hysterical laughter was stop by his growling stomach.

"Here eat this" he handed Sora a bag full of sandwiches, and a coke. "I thought you might need it"

"Thanks" after devouring the sandwiches, Sora felt a lot better. At least now he didn't have to worry about Roxas' answer, that just left one more problem.

"Why did you leave?"

"I just wanted to be alone. Things aren't going well at home. My parents have been fighting a lot lithely. its suffocatin, but yesterday was the worst. They put the blame on me for their fight, they even said they never wanted to have me." Just remembering made the brunet's dark feelings come back. The sadness and loneliness had been eating him since yesterday, and the blond notice.

Roxas hugged Sora and said "Don't let those words get to you, sometimes parents are in too much pressure and it makes them fight. Stress and anger make people do and say things they don't mean, because if they didn't want you, they wouldn't be looking for you right now"

"Thanks" Roxas realize he was still hugging him and let go at lightning speed.

" I'm sorry for going on a rampage earlier, I should have known you had a good reason, but next time you need someone call me"

"I will thanks and your rant shows you care." Sora smile mischievously. "On that note, you said you like me"

"No I didn't"

"Do I need to quote exactly what you said" and as he said this he lean closer to Roxas

"No, nope, no. It's fine" Roxas was sure his face had discovered a new type of red, because of how much he was blushing. His remedy to this was to put some distance between them.

"I'm getting the feeling you aren't happy with your feelings" the silence told Sora he was right or close. " I think we should give it a try"

The blond couldn't believe his ears "You mean go out?"

The brunet nodded enthusiastically meanwhile Roxas wasn't convinced. "Aww come on, you said you regretted not telling me. What if you regret not trying? Let's try it for 2 months, if it doesn't work out, we forget about all this, the pictures, fates and red strings. Ok?" Sora said hopeful.

Roxas touch his pinky and asked "Do you still have the picture?"

"Yep" Sora had that picture well kept, he liked the way Roxas looked.

"Ok, sure, but we're keeping it a secret. At least until the two months are over."

"Why?"

"Kairi, Xion and Namine will try to interfere more. They had been doing that since they found out we are soulmates"

"I promise but I doubt that's going to stop them"

"Now what do you say about going back home and stop the search" Roxas said as he extended his hand for Sora to hold.