HELLO MAHABHARATA

29. Saudade

Saudade (English: /ˌsaʊˈdɑːdə/, European Portuguese: [sɐwˈðaðɨ], is a deep emotional state of nostalgic or melancholic longing for something or someone that one cares for and loves.

KUNTI LOOKED AT HER SONS in unnerved silence and delusion. The adjure she had just ordered was bound to create horns on dilemma. She exited from the chamber to follow her daughter in law.

The queen mother went towards the corridors leading to the chambers of Draupadi in the eastern direction of the palace, only to find it was vacant. "Dasi, where is Queen Draupadi?" a worried Kunti questioned​ and a maid replied with a bowed head, "Pranipat Rajmata, the queen has been residing in a hut built in the front lawns from the last eleven months."

Hut?

Pritha rushed towards the courtyard taking to the lawns. She was carefully traveling her eyea at the husk and chaff residence. Draupadi is staying here because her son Arjun is on an exile, devoid of all the necessities then luxury definitely comes after hand in the scenario. The moonlight was now diffusing the entire city in the deep slumber except the royal palace. The silver illumination was spreading across the vast flower valley beside the odd structure. She heard a few sobs from the ashram and her steps moved further in guilt. Was that a righteous decision?

"Putri Draupadi" Kunti's voice shook as she stood on the door post of the hut. Draupadi wiped off a drop of tear with her knuckles. "This— husk and sand, it reminds me of that day when I saw you for the maiden time as my daughter in law, the fortune of my lineage. My words had pierced your heart that day, and today also I have uttered a few words which might have pierced your s-"

The Panchal princess immediately got up from the kush mat she was sitting on "No Mata. Please, you must not blame yourself for anything. I am so blessed, for your five sons have been my constant support system. Nothing was imposed on me ever. It was my decision to marry and grace myself with being the ladylove of your strong and mighty son, the Pandavas!" she pressed Kunti's hand in hers looking into her eyes with extreme assurance.

"Draupadi, you have always been a guiding light to my sons and this time I am here to ask something for my Simran." Kunti placed her hand on the dark woman's shoulder while their eyes glistened in an unknown harmony.

"Mata, It is not hidden that Simran has been in love with Aarya Arjun even before my swayamvar. They say that introspection from one's still and calm mind might give you answers, and I received mine here. If she didn't fall for him all these years, then she wouldn't have immersed herself in that painting for hours which she had painted on my insistence, she would not have kept raving about him and his prowess to me, she wouldn't have described about those sinuous and the intricate details of his appearance, that only a person who truly believes, devotes themselves in someone else, can observe" Kunti was surprised and a smoke of guilt was swamping her subconscious.

For all those years how can the young maiden, that mystery girl from the faraway land accept circumstances with a smile on her lips.

"Mata I would lie if I will deny that I am not hurt. But I cannot decline or be selfish enough to claim all that love and succor she has given me till now was false. She cared for me like her own sister everytime I had my little ones squirming in my womb. She didn't even let me step from the bed for even once. She provide protection and affection to Prativindhya like a mother, when I was pregnant with Shatanika and I wasn't able to spend much time with him. Everytime my willpower was low to accept my such destiny or my conscious pestered me to judge or downcast my lifeline, she was there to motivate and uphold me. Losing your parents, staying in a land completely alien, outlandish era that without even having a single familiar knowledge of what has been going around you is not less than some of horrifying nightmare. I cannot deny how she arranged meetings and those chances so that I can begin off my journey with levels of comfort in this exceptional marriage. Never for once I felt that she loves him. Whenever I and Aarya Arjun were together she had a genuine gaiety on her face!"