Jᴏsʜᴜᴀ ʙᴀssᴇᴛᴛ ɪᴍᴀɢɪɴᴇs <3

I Wish I Were Heather

a/n: this chapter has an OC (original character)
details: name; Heather 
looks: blonde hair, blue eyes, perfect smile  personality: nice, sweet, smart, funny
this chapter is based on the song Heather by Conan Gray!
as always, y/n=your name
s/n=school name

❝I still remember the third of December❞

I walk into class on the first day of school and sit next to my best friend, Joshua, like I do every year. We start talking about our summers and vacations we went on.

"Attention boys and girls, we have a new student this year! Meet Heather O'Lemi! Please give her a warm welcome to S/N High!" My teacher says with a smile.

I watch your eyes as she walks by; what a sight for sore eyes; brighter than a blue sky❞

I notice that Joshua can't take her eyes off of her. I don't blame him though, she's absolutely gorgeous. Her ocean eyes are beautiful, she has these pretty golden locks that fall perfectly over her shoulder, and her smile is bright and radiant.

Heather sits down right next to Joshua. All through class I catch them staring at each other. The look in Joshua's eyes, he's mesmerized.

Heather is stunning. She's looks like a model. Perfect hair, perfect teeth, perfect body, perfect smile, she's perfect. She's everything I'm not. 

••••••••••••••••••••••••••

❝Watch as she stands with her holding your hands; put your arm 'round her shoulder; now I'm getting colder❞

I sit down at my usual table in the corner next to
Joshua, but the table looks more crowded than usual.

Heather is sitting right next to Joshua.

We barely talk for the hour we get to eat. They laugh and talk, it's like I'm invisible.

The way they look at each other. I can tell that there is a spark.

After a while, Heather looks at me and asks, "I don't think I ever got your name?"

"O-oh, it's y/n," I reply with a fake smile.

How could I hate her? She's such an angel; But then again, kinda wish she were dead ❞

I feel like I'm being too mean, for all I know, she can be the nicest person in the world, yet I just can't act like she is my friend.

Joshua has this glimmer in his eyes that he never had around me. I'm happy for him because I can tell that he is happy. But at the same time, I wish I was Heather. I wish that it was me that he fell for.

"Hey, y/n, why are you being so quiet? Why don't you join in on our conversation? We were just talking about how Heather's father is the CEO of this huge company so she gets to meet all these celebrities! Isn't that so cool?" Joshua says.

If only he knew. If only he knew how much I like him. If only he knew how this is killing me inside, seeing him with someone else.

I just want to cry. I want to tell Joshua how I feel. I want him to like me. I want to be good enough.

•••••••••••

❝What a sight for sore eyes; brighter than a blue sky; she's got you mesmerized while I die ❞

As I walk to my homeroom, I spot something, almost peculiar. Joshua isn't at his locker. I didn't see him all day. Where could he be? I look around.

There he is...

At Heathers's locker...

I need to pass her locker to get to class anyway, so maybe I can eavesdrop and see what they're talking about. I know it's not a good thing to eavesdrop on your best friend, but either that or I don't know whether or not they're dating—which they probably are.

I quietly walk to the bathroom and pause for a moment. I can't hear all they're saying, just something along the lines of, "you're so amazing! of course i'll go out with you!"

•••••••••••

❝You like her better; I wish I were Heather ❞

When I get home, I run to my room and lock the door.

My mom always told me that when I'm upset, to write it down. Apparently that helps. I'll take any opportunity to feel better, so I take out a scrap of paper and a pen and start writing.

"Am I jealous? And, why am I jealous? I'm supposed to love myself. But, I just... can't. Why? Why am I not good enough? What does Joshua not see in me? I'm not worth it. I'm not even half as pretty, kind, smart, funny, honest as Heather. She's practically perfect. I'm so ugly, rude, stupid, and annoying. Im nothing compared to her."

Tear stains fall onto the page and blur the ink.

I just want to curl up into a ball and die.

He was never mine to lose. Why am I so upset? I have no right to dictate who he can and cannot like. Of course he's still my best friend, but talking to him every day knowing he's dating Heather is killing me inside. The thing is that he is so happy with her. I want him to be happy, but knowing he's happy with her and not me makes me just want to cry. I wish I were Heather.