talking to the moon//h.s.

01

"you can't keep missing him maryah..." i whisper to myself, it's been weeks and i still haven't let myself grieve. i've been writing in this journal every night for weeks. what i'm feeling is better written than said.

"what do you do when you can't sleep?" a deep voice asks. it's a familiar voice, i just can't figure out who's voice it is.

i try to shake it off, but then i remember that today is my birthday. today i'm eighteen. today i get to talk to my soulmate for the first time.

"i watch the stars." i respond hesitantly, i can't let anyone else in yet. not right now at least. "what do you do?" i make a lame attempt at striking up a conversation.

i begin to second-guess myself since the voice doesn't respond for a while. i feel my heart rate increase from the fear that i already scared them off.

i mean it's not everyday that you meet someone that talks to the stars. it's weird to most people. the last person i met that didn't think talking to the stars/moon was a weird thing was jasper.

"i meditate." the voice finally responds and i feel my breathing hitch. i feel like i've heard someone say that before, but i don't want to slam someone i don't know with questions.

"what..?" i try to think of some possible idea of who it could be but until i can think any more, madison texts me.

madison:
we have dates tonight.
be ready at seven.

i've never been a fan of her ideas, but i usually go along with it since we've been friends since the beginning of high school. i sigh, standing up from where i'm sitting, and walking to my closet. i pick an outfit but realize i don't know what to do with my hair.

"i have to figure out what to do with my hair for the date." i sigh, shaking my head at the thought of a date.

i've refused to talk to people ever since jasper passed away and i'm positive that he would be upset about it.

it's just hard to meet people that won't judge me based off of my trauma. you tell someone that you don't talk to your biological parents and they automatically assume you're a crack baby.

before i can freak myself out anymore, the voice speaks again.

"curl it." they speak softly, almost as if they're scared of talking to me.

"thank you." i smile, this voice is more than likely my soulmate but if it's not, i don't mind being pscitzophrenic.

•••

the date sucked, to put it nicely. the guys were assholes and don't even get me started on the food.

they kept making sly remarks about madison's outfit and my body. it made me more than uncomfortable to say the least.

i quickly take off my outfit and put on the clothes i was wearing before, sitting back down at my desk. i think about all of the things that i could possibly write about when the voice speaks.

"do you like harry styles?" they ask, almost hesitating to say harry's name. i automatically realize who the voice belongs to and feel my heart practically jump out of my chest.

no, they can't be harry styles. i might just be reaching but i promise this voice sounds exactly like his.

"i've always been more of a niall girl." i respond quickly, but not too quick. i don't want to scare him off but i don't want him to think i'm ignoring him.