Because We Had Us

Chapter 25. Five Becomes Four

Xay

     "No, what happened!" My voice boomed through the large room of half conscious bodies. It wasn't possible their was no such thing as a loophole in our humanity, we were the ambassadors. Our whole training was based on ridding us of our emotions. It had to be Ky he was the only one who could have saved him. Ruth looked up at me with a mixture of relief and fear in her eyes.

     "I'm sorry brother, but Jo was right." She looked towards the door and back at me. Slowly, from behind the door emerged my boss, former trainer, and the president of COA: Leonard Stanley. He towered over me at 6 foot tall, with black hair, brown eyes, an Australian accent, and a ripped body that intimidated me greatly. Up until this moment I thought he was still on Earth.

     "Leo how are you here?" My voice shook as I spoke; I had been caught.

     "Someone had to come clean up your mess Xavier. You see you are the reason for this experiment, you and Ky both." He walked closer to me causing me to flinch. "For years now we've been trying to see if there was a soul with enough humanity left in them to actually sacrifice themselves for the other subjects, and up until now everyone had failed." I stared at him in utter confusion and shock. "This whole plan or theory to rid humanity of compassion and loyalty we fed you was just another part of the experiment. You see the viruses were to see how easy it was to persuade the people of anything the media fed them, which proved to be very easily." I suddenly felt sick to my stomach.

     "The ambassadors group was put together to see how humans reacted when given power in a vulnerable state. You all, with the exception of the noble Barnett, proved that when someone's normal is ripped away from them that they will believe and do anything to find a new normal, even if it means loosing yourself completely in the process. And the 5 well they proved that their is hope for the next generation. They proved that humanity isn't doomed. They proved that love truly does conquer all. I programmed that loophole just as Jocelyn suspected. Her sacrifice saved us all. The five's small moments of compassion were truly the most epic moments of their battle. 

     I glanced at Ruth who had tears streaming down her face. The rest of the five were all awake, with the exception of Jocelyn who was gone forever. Corin was standing over her, his face full of desperation and anger, Miriam was shaking Corin begging him to explain what was happening, and Laz sat still on his exam table in his lonesome expressionless.

     "Am I so wrong to not want to feel all of this?" I asked Leo my weighted question, gesturing towards the five, which was now only four.

     "Xavier, look at them," Leo commanded me in a half whisper. "The reason they feel this now is because once they loved, and without love what is life?" I had no words I could only stare emotionless like I always did. "You my friend are not living, though this state of numbness has become your normal it does not have to be," he said, his voice full of hope. He talked to me like I was his son who he was disciplining out of love. "Xavier let me save you from normal." A tear streamed down my face.

     "I don't want to be saved," I screamed at him! Suddenly, everyone's attention shifted to me. In that moment of awkwardness I ran out of the exam room, letting my feet carry me further and further down the endless tunnels with no destination in mind. Suddenly I fell to the ground, tripping over a mysterious mass, hitting my head. My vision was blurry, but I could see enough to make out the what I tripped over to be my once best friend's body. Ky was lying motionless beside me, with a blade still in his body. A short and sappy suicide note was placed upon his chest.

     It read, "Jocelyn and Miriam if you find me I want you to know the brother you loved was already gone, the person I killed was just a shell that held a lost man. I'm sorry, but I want you both to know, even though I tried to deny it, I never stopped loving you two- Ky."

     Seeing Ky's cold pale body scared the life out of me. I didn't want to end up like him. I had never been so lost and without direction in my life. If I lived like Barnett I could die, but if I lived like Ky my odds were no better. Was there a certain way to live? If so why couldn't I seem to find it? With nowhere to go I laid next to the shell of Ky and let my endless thoughts engulf me.

     After what seemed like hours passed by I heard the sound of thudding footsteps in the distance. Just kill me already I thought, but it wasn't Leo who had found me in my existential crisis, it was my sister.

     "Get up brother," she commanded me, giving me her hand. Why was she being generous to me?

     "Why have you come to see me?" My voice held an immense amount of pain. "Don't you have more friends to try to kill." I chuckled at my own joke, that once she would had found amusing too. Ruth didn't respond, but I could tell from the look in her eyes that she regretted her decision of helping me. "If you're here to try to fix me Ruthie don't waste your time."

     "I don't want to fix you," she begun with tears in her eyes. "I just want my big brother; I'm all alone in this world." She sobbed onto my shoulder as I embraced her in to a hug. "They will never forgive me," she cried!

     "With time they will Ruthie but for now you've got me," I whispered to her. "I know I'm not brother of the year, but everything I did, I did it out of my love for you." I guess I hadn't turned my back on my compassion completely. Realizing this left me with a new sense of hope.

     "What's going to happen to us Xay?" Ruth's eyes, that held so much fear and uncertainty met mine. "Will they lock us up for what we've done?" As much as I wanted to tell her everything would be ok I couldn't lie to her. "I don't wanna go back to juvie, I was just starting to become better!"

     I held her close to me, stroking her hair. "Whatever happens will happen sister, but we have us don't ever forget that." She wiped her tears from her eyes.

     "Blood over bond," she whispered to me. A smile appeared on my face as I said back to her our mantra.

     "Blood over bond sister." And with that I gave her Ky's farewell note to give to the little one. I knew I would see my sister soon again, but right now the world needed her more than I did. I sent her back to the exam room, with a heavy heart. Leo and the rest of the five would accept her, for I was the one who corrupted her innocent mind; but me I had to go my separate ways.