Candy // SeulRene

13

Days passed by and it's already Saturday I'm in the hospital waiting for my turn for my weekly check up. I'm growing impatient because I still have a date later on with Seulgi. By the mention of her name in my head I started to think about this passed few days that I have spent with her

Everything went smoothly with Seulgi and I. She introduced me to her friend Seungwan and her cousin Joy. They were friendly to me and treated me nicely. It wasn't hard belonging to their group I don't know how but we just click especially Seungwan and I, we became best friend well I like her a lot not romantically but as a friend I just thought that she needs a lot of attention and protection that's why I give it to her. Seulgi would often get jealous by how close Seungwan and I get but she just shut up when I give her a kiss such a baby

Everything took turns in my life eversince I met Seulgi. My alone time was replaced of me being with her, My lonely lunch was replaced by me having lunch with her and her friends. My gloomy days have been replaced by sunshine and butterflies thanks to Seulgi.

My thought have been cut when I felt my phone vibrate in my pocket

From: Seulbear

What time should I pick you up and where? I'm kinda anxious and excited you know.

Hey pretty Baechu reply please ಥ╭╮ಥ

To: Seulbear

I don't know yet...still not done here Ó╭╮Ò

From: Seulbear

It's okay I'll wait for you. Whenever and wherever.

Focus on what your doing for now just text me if you're ready to goooooo. I love you Bae Joohyun

To: Seulbear

👍

From: Seulbear

༼;´༎ຶ ۝ ༎ຶ༽

"Pfft" I laugh at her ugly reply. Everyday Seulgi would text me may it be 'Good night pretty Baechu' or 'Good morning pretty Baechu' she would always insert pretty Baechu and when I told her to stop saying that she only replied with

From: Seulbear

I just want to tell you every single time that you are a really pretty person inside and outside because you don't seem to know that

She get cheesy day by day

"Ms.Bae Joohyun" I heard the assistant called my name

"Here" my mother said and the assistant lead us inside the doctors office. Every Saturday morning my mom,dad and Jisoo would clear their schedule just to come with me to see the doctor

The moment that the assistant opened the door for us. I saw Dr.Lee sitting on his table looking at some papers. He look at us and motion for his assistant to leave the room then they start talking about my sickness. I didn't even bother to listen since I already know what's happening in my body.

"Until when would I last?" I asked and everyone turn their attention to me

"Sweetie please don't" my mom beg. They all understand what I mean by it I'm giving up my therapy and all treatment that I would receive it's not like it's had an effect on me. The doctor excused himself to give us privacy

"Come on we all knew that it's too late for me"

"No sweetie it's not too late for you. Let's do chemotherapy again okay?" Mommy is now tearing up kneeling infront of me holding my hands

"Mommy stop it please. I-i can't *I broke down I can't hold it inside anymore* it hurt so much that I have to do this shits for you. That I have to give up living just to continue this life"

"You don't understand sweetie" Mommy said which made my anger burst out even more

"I don't understand?. NO YOU DON'T UNDERSTAND.YOU DONT KNOW HOW MUCH THE THERAPIES HURT!!! well guess what IT MADE YOU WISH TO DIE INSTEAD,*I laugh bitterly* YOU DON'T KNOW HOW MUCH BITTER THE MEDICINE THAT THEY CHOKE YOU WITH, YOU DON'T KNOW HOW MANY NEEDLES THEY WOULD INJECT INSIDE YOU, YOU DON'T KNOW HOW THE CHEMICAL HURTS!!! *I look at all of them, Daddy is trying to stop his tears from falling and holding Mommy who can't stop crying, Jisoo is trying so hard to stop her tears,it hurts seeing them like this but I also have to tell them my part* Yo-you don't know anything. Every single day I wish I could just die but I can't knowing my parents are still holding into me, but I'm not your only daughter... M-mommy Daddy... you also have Jisoo. You don't know how much she m-misses you b-both *I chuckled the bitterness in my word. I turn to look at Jisoo-unnie* Jisoo do you know why I can't call you Unnie anymore and I kept my mouth shut even though I know that your hurting because you felt like you are forgotten by Mommy and Daddy?... That's because I hate you, I hate you the so muvh. I hate how you have everything and how everyone loves you while I only have Mommy and Daddy. Eversince I was diagnosed I never experienced what's living is and looking at you being lively and full of life kills me. I thought you deserve to be unloved by our parents because if it's not you. I would never agree to this treatment just to pleased Mommy and Daddy. I continued the treatment even though it pierced every single cell in my body because I was afraid that you would a-all a-aband-doned me" I choke out every single word and stop there. I can't continue anymore.

I just stood there and cried. Then Jisoo approach and comfort me. I'm still guilty of what I did to her. So I cried even louder and balled myself into her arm. Repeating the words sorry.

"It's ok don't cry. I already know everything *I sit up to meet her eyes still crying* I told you I know you more than you know yourself and I know why you did that" she smiled and I can't help myself but to hug her and cry on her shoulder

"Jisoo-unnie" I called out

"Aigoo my doengsaeng is a crybaby" she patted my back. Soon after I felt that Mommy and Daddy also hug me and we had a family hug

"I'm so sorry sweetie, I'm so sorry that I failed as a mother to the both of you. I'm so sorry" Mommy said kissing Jisoo-unnie and me

"No Mommy you didn't fail. No one is perfect everyone commits a mistake and it's never too late to fix that" Jisoo-unnie

After all the crying. We called the doctor. I ask him again if how long will I take but instead of answering he gave me an advice instead 'I suggest that you 'll leave your life on how you want it to. Treasure each moment always remember that you have to made every second' By that we all knew what he meant... my time is running out