Fleeting Moments

Chapter 15: Sleeping Beauty

#HHFM Chapter 15:

Sleeping Beauty

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"Ipalilinis sa isang araw 'yung kuwartong ginagamit mo, 'tapos, puwedeng dito ka na magtigil."

I scanned the place. The room's bigger by a half than the guest room I have been occupying for the past months. Wala pang binubuksang ilaw si Ryo pero maliwanag at maaliwalas sa loob, probably because of the clean white walls and the huge window letting natural light pass through. In front of that was the crib that we bought and a bed frame. Katulad ng sa guest room, may wall closet sa kanan na paniguradong kahit isama ang damit ni Raiko, hindi ko kayang punuin. On the opposite side was a white door, which I assumed was leading to the bathroom. Mayroon ding maliit na flat screen TV, isang mini shelf, at magkapares na lamesa't upuan.

Ryo flicked the light switch on, at lalo lang nagliwanag. He closed the door and picked up the remote control on top of the table. That must be for the air conditioner. I clicked another switch and the lights were dimmed. Napalingon sa akin si Ryo dahil doon.

"Masyado pa rin ba 'yang maliwanag para sa 'yo? Makatutulog ka ba 'pag ganiyan? Hindi kasi puwedeng madilim masyado e, gawa n'ong bata."

"Okay na 'to," I answered. He merely nodded before heading to the crib. I flicked the switch again and the lights were back to normal.

They set this free room up for me and Raiko. Hindi ko lang sure kung ibig sabihin ba n'on ay kasama ko rin si Ryo rito.

My expected due was in a few days, and it was both exciting and terrifying. I wanted to call Nanay and ask for a little advice, but that would give away my pregnancy.

I watched as Ryo attached the small, hanging bears at the side of Raiko's crib. Binaklas kasi iyon noong inilipat ang crib dito.

Ever since that incident, I felt like something has changed, but I couldn't pinpoint if it was in his end or mine. We were still on speaking terms, though. It's just that there was something different now. Or maybe it was just me overthinking his actions and words.

Paano ba naman kasi ako matatahimik pagkatapos kong malaman iyon?

Ryo acted like nothing happened after dropping such a heavy confession. Parang hindi big deal sa kaniya iyon habang mababaliw na yata ako sa kaiisip. Lagi naman siyang ganoon. Noong nag-stay ako sa kuwarto niya at siya sa kuwarto ko, noong hinawakan niya ang kamay ko, at pati na ang nangyaring halik sa pisngi noong bagong taon, laging parang wala lang sa kaniya.

We haven't touched that topic again ever since that day. Maybe because we were thinking of the same thing—that my labour is the most important thing right now.

While I was trying my best to distract myself from the fear of delivery, si Ryo naman e maya't maya ang tanong sa akin kung may nararamdaman ba akong kung ano. Kaya ang ending, babalik ang kaba ko.

"Nandito 'yung damit ni Raiko. Hindi ko pa naaayos kasi baka makita ni Mommy. May binili rin si Daddy na mga gamit, pero nasa kuwarto ko pa, 'di ko pa nabubuksan."

"Ryo," tawag ko sa kaniya at agad siyang tumigil sa pag-aalwas ng mga damit ni Raiko mula roon sa bag na hawak niya. For a moment there, I hesitated to speak. Baka kasi masamain niya ang itatanong ko.

"Bakit?" tanong niya nang bigla akong natahimik. I noticed how worry grew in his eyes when I didn't respond.

"May masakit ba?"

Before I could even tell him no, he was already across the room, pulling the chair with him. Hindi naman ako nangangalay pero umupo na lang ako para hindi siya masyadong mag-alala. Umandar na naman ang excessive worrying niya. Imbes na hindi ako kabahan sa panganganak, kakabahan ako dahil sa kaniya.