Sinful Devotion

Chapter 6

"your biggest commitment must and always be to yourself."

Chapter 6

I have always known this time would come but I've always seen it as something really far away from me, now I couldn't see it like that anymore because the time is here... literally. It's no more a question of 'when', that's already here. Now it's time for the question of 'what' and 'where'.

What do I want to do with my life after secondary school that's going to be done with next year or more precisely less than eight months from now? Where do I want to go to University?

Both are really tough questions for me, the former harder than the latter. I could just go be with Nessa at Cambridge. That sounds perfect even, I'd have family with me and at the same time no one would be poking their head into my business all the time. Nessa's supportive of my life and all my decisions already, it'll be completely okay.

So... Cambridge, I write it down on the paper in front of me as a one choice. I could choose another or go with it. Now what do I go to do in Cambridge?

"Stop stressing about it so much," Nile says from across the table where we're sitting at the library, two computers between us. She reaches over and touches a finger on my forehead like she's smoothing a line. "You'd get aging lines."

I sigh, "how can I not stress about it? The only idea I have now is Cambridge."

"Cambridge is a great Uni, I was thinking about that too." Nile says sitting back down on her chair.

"The Uni is not my biggest problem, N and you know it."

"It's mine."

"Lucky you."

She smiles sheepishly, "sorry."

I fall my head down on the table, "I am hopeless."

"No, you're not." She looks around before scooting her chair closer to me. "What are your best subjects?"

I raise my head up a big, "English..."

"Uh huh?" She prods.

"Um," I pick on my hair looking for another.

"English cannot be all Is, what subjects do you have take?"

"I take English literature, history, French and maths." I list out on my finger. I dropped science courses this year, they were stressing me out.

"Favourites then?"

"I like all and English."

Nile slaps her forehead and it isn't a laughing matter else I would have laughed. Her lips are a light shade of purple today with darkened eye lashes. "Force yourself to pick at least two more."

I inhale deeply, "okay so, English, History and French."

"Hm, okay," she draws my book closer to her. "Courses you can do; Law?"

I cringe, "no way. I can barely stand up for myself as it is."

"You could just study History?"