Zeelandia

49. Of Oranges and Retrospection

While the sun reddened the sky to the west, Zeelandia's decks and yardarms were a flurry of activity. Charles was occupied with instructing Mister Matthews and Master, as well as receiving and replying to reports, but at a lull in his business, I said to him, "To be out of the way, Father and I will go below."

He nodded, then he turned to order the longboats recovered and secured for sea.

Father followed me down the steps, and when we arrived in the great cabin, he said, "Ah! I remember this. Such a splendid accommodation. I had not before seen one as grand."

He paused for a long while as he examined, then he continued, "But I recall a far older captain. Angus was his name. What came of him?"

"He had tired of the sea, so Charles purchased Zeelandia from him a few months ago."

"Ah! So he comes from a family of considerable wealth. Noble lineage, I assume. An easy decision for me, then."

I motioned to the chairs by the windows, and as we moved toward them, I said, "No, he was an orphan in the streets of London."

"A commoner. Far below your standing, Camille. We can do much better for you."

"I wish to marry for love, not for position."

"Highly unusual. Consider his breeding. Is he honest? From where did he get the money to purchase this? And the land he tells you he has? How can you trust him?"

"He used a portion of his share of the plunder from the raid two and a half years ago."

Father winced and nodded. "Yes, a vast sum. Gone." He sighed, then shook his head. "Charles seems very young to be the captain."

"A year in Thames barges and ten years in Zeelandia. His shipboard duty began as a cabin boy." I paused to grin at him. "Just as had you and I and Sir Francis Drake, so he is in good company." I giggled. "And also, Drake was the son of a common farmer, but that did not prevent him from excelling."

Father chuckled and ruffled my hair. "Still the same girl. Still so quick and gay."

I warmed to his touch, then I placed my hand on his and caressed it. Oh, God! Skin and bones. Starved. I lept to my feet, saying, "Oranges," as I rushed across the cabin to Steward's pantry. "Would you care for an orange? Or several? You must be famished."

"Oh, indeed. I have had little but fish and gruel all these many months."

I returned with the gauze bag and set it on the chair between us. "Please, have as many as you will."

He grabbed one, and he had barely begun removing the peel, when he pulled out a two-segment piece and shoved it into his mouth, juice running down his beard as he chewed. Two more segments followed, then two more as he continued peeling. Then he paused, shaking his head, and when he had cleared his mouth, he said, "Sorry, Sweetheart. Not the manners for polite company."

"Tut-tut. Eat! Enjoy! Ignore the manners for the nonce."

He placed the next segments into his mouth with a little more grace, and when he had finished them all, I pointed to the bag. "Have another; we have plenty."

He looked at them and then up into my eyes and winced. "I was greedy. Devoured an entire one. We must share these with the others."

I pointed forward. "We have plenty aboard. I had told Charles to have Cookery Mate buy as many bushels of them as would not spoil before being eaten."

Father laughed. "You told the captain?"

"Of course; otherwise, how would he know? Ruth had given me these, and I found –"

"Ruth?"

"My sempstress in Barbados. She and her husband have an orangery, and the fruit has just now come into season." I selected a large one and placed it in Father's hand. "Enjoy."

He ate this one with more decorum, and between bites, he asked me about Ruth. After I had described her and her situation, I said, "In a few minutes, I learnt from her far more about coming of age, about becoming a woman, and about acting as one, than I had from Mother's dreadful instruction and prohibition."

Father grimaced. "After Chris had all but raped you, her mind had taken another turn."

I nodded. "And I now see she had blamed me. When my changes began, she answered my concern by telling me my nethers were turning ugly as a punishment for my evil ways, and that they would bleed and ache."

He choked on his bite, then shook his head while he finished the mouthful. "Did you not speak with others about this? With Elizabeth? With Mary? With your other cousins? Even the staff?"

"She confined me to the house and forbade me company." I shrugged. "Her angry reception to callers soon made none dare approach. The laundry maid set me straight about the bleeding, but when Mother caught me talking with her, she was dismissed. The same with the housemaid and the tutor, so I dared not speak with the cook, lest I needed to take on that task as well."

"Oh, dear God!" He blew a deep breath. "I had thought once Chris had been sent away, she would regain a semblance of stability. Why did you not go and seek assistance?"

"She forbade me to leave the house." I shrugged again. "Other than reading, I spent much of my time as Mother's charwoman, following your admonition that I obey her in all matters while you were away."

He shook his head. "There is a limit, Camille. Orders are to be obeyed only so long as they make sense. What if Charles were to order the ship to sail onto the rocks?"

"That is all of an instant, Father. Of course, I would question. But with Mother, the descent of her mind was insidious, slow and not noticeable. At least, not to me. And I had been raised to trust, believe and obey her. It is only the past few weeks, as I allowed myself the freedom to analyse in retrospect, that I have begun to question."

I paused to search for an analogy, then I lifted my hand. "The one is as if I dipped this into a pot of water too hot; I would immediately notice and remove it. The other is as if I held it in water slowly heating on the stove, not noticed until damage is done."

Father nodded. "I should have warned you, but you were still a child, a young maiden not yet begun your changes."

"In body, yes, but my mind would have understood." I selected another orange and passed it to him. "But that is all in the past, and we can do nothing to change it. Its value now is that we can learn from it."

As Zeelandia took on an increased heel to starboard from the press of the wind, I pointed through the stern windows at the receding island. "Just as now we have learnt to not dally in pirate havens."