I am sorry. I failed.

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Strolling into the office of her Chef Nataly let herself fall down onto the armchair standing in front of his office table. Her Chef had ordered her here to thank her, as per usual, to review today's happenings and thank her for her work but when she got to his office he had walked out, telling her he had to take care of something real quick, his phone still on his ear. Then he disappeared out of the door that lead to the hallways. Nataly had made the decision to wait for him in his office, not really up for staying in front of his door until he would get back. She yawned, being tired from today's work as the criminal had put up quite a big fight before she had been able to catch him.
Nataly somehow doubted that he would become a proper citizen, even after they had erased his memories but what did she know of how the weird technology worked that they were entrusted with. Still, just because their memories from the time they had been a villain were deleted didn't change anything about their personalities. Besides that, Dejan, who had gotten himself caught by her several times already when trying to rob the same damn bank using the same method each time also made it hard for her to believe that criminals could actually change for the better.
She shifted a bit in her seat when a newspaper on Alans desk caught her eyes. There was a picture of her on the front page but she couldn't remember ever ending up in a newspaper to begin with. Her jobs were far too fast done for others to write about them before their memories got wiped out again. She reached out for the newspaper and picked it up, inspecting it sceptically.
The article told about yet another epic fight between 'the greatest hero' and 'the most powerful villain' and how the villain got away in the end as always. The whole article, despite actually having to be written neutral, contained a lot of critic against the hero, saying that the villain only ever was able to escape because the hero did a bad job. It was almost like saying she had done it on purpose, not that she could really say something against it. She couldn't even remember the so called 'most powerful villain' anymore nor that it apparently took a while for her to catch them.
Nataly scrunched up her nose and was about to place the newspaper away again, not really liking the headache that the article was giving her when the quote from an officer caught her eye,
"Nataly Gibson is nowhere to be found in our system. It's like she never existed. No one knows who she is and why she wants us to remember her. We can only hope that Alan will be able to catch her soon so she stops vandalizing our beloved city" That's when her jar dropped. She hadn't been the hero in this fight but the villain.
Her eyes flickered back to the picture, still not being able to remember anything about these happenings but it also made sense. If her memories got wiped out as well after she had been caught she wouldn't remember those things anymore after all. But why would she be a villain. And what was that about her not even existing in the system and her wish for others to remember her?
When the pain in her forehead grew stronger she bought up her free hand to message her templates. She sighed, not able to understand what the article meant when she caught a glimpse of an opened drawer beneath the table.
Placing the Newspaper back on the desk she stood up and made her way over, looking at the huddle of further newspapers and articles that were piling up in said drawer. She kneeled down in front of it before picking one article up that was laying on top.
"Alan manages to save the day once again but Nataly remains uncaught", the headline alone already gave her enough information so she placed it on the ground next to her and grabbed another one, reading over the headline again,
"Nataly almost burned down the city but Alan managed to get everyone to safety." She gulped, then started skipping through various reports, pulling them out and reading a few lines before randomly placing them somewhere on the floor around her. She had read at least 12 articles and 9 Newspapers with several reports from different years and there were still a lot more in the drawer. Every single one of those articles described a different attack she has supposedly put the city under. The city that she now tried to protect with her life.
She couldn't think of any reason that could've turned her into a villain to begin with but then again, she couldn't remember any of the happenings from all those years anyways. She placed down the article in her hand while taking a short breath, the headache only increasing even more with every new article she read over.
She was more than confused. Not only could she not remember of any of these things anymore but she also didn't have a memory gab which meant that, if she truly had been the villain those articles talked about, the memories she always believed to be true were fake ones.
How much had she forgotten? And what of those memories she could remember right now were true? Was anything the truth to begin with? Or was her whole life a big lie, made up so she could be reintroduced into society? Was that how it worked?
Her eyes flickered to the door when she heard the front door of their office and she gulped. Hastily she grabbed all the articles she had scattered across the floor and pushed them back into the drawer when a few papers caught her eye. They were at the far bottom of the drawer and Nataly wouldn't have seen them if she hadn't accidentally pushed all the articles to the back of the drawer, the larger papers mostly staying securely in place.
She glanced up once more, nibbling on her lower lip before pulling them out and stuffing them under her jacket. Then she stood up and speed walked back to the chair she had previously sat on and sat down on it again. Pulling out her phone in order to pretend she was busy with something, Alan walked into the room and Nataly hold her breath.
"Sorry that you had to wait," he said, giving her a sheepish smile before walking over to his desk. Nataly could see how his eyes widened a bit when he saw the article laying on his desk before sitting down in his chair. Nataly put away her phone, shifting slightly in her armchair but still wasn't able to get comfortable. She felt horrible that she was currently stealing things from her Chef but she had to know what all those articles were about and she hoped that those papers hold the answered to all her questions.
"Today was quite a long day wasn't it?" Alan asked while placing his hand on the Newspaper and pulling it closer to him. Nataly tried her best to seem like she didn't notice while nodding her head at his statement.
"But in the end you still got him and we could erase his memories so he can be reintroduced into society soon," he said and Nataly wanted so bad to ask more about how the process worked. However she knew it would be suspicious to ask about it after all those years where she couldn't care less so she kept quiet. Alan picked up the newspaper and placed it in the drawer where the other articles and newspapers were before turning back to Nataly. She gulped again, hoping that Alan hadn't noticed that something was missing but he apparently didn't pay enough attention to the drawer before he had pushed it close.
"Yeah, that's good," she mumbled and Alan propped himself up on his hands.
"Is everything alright? You seem a bit pale," he asked, worry laced in his voice which only confused Nataly even more. She shook her head which hadn't been the best idea since she immediately started to feel slightly dizzy and ought up her hands to hold her head in order to steady it a little bit.
"I just have a headache again. I guess I need some sleep," she said, forcing a light chuckle and Alan nodded, then gave her a warm smile.
"Of course, rest well and if it's not better by tomorrow morning let me know so you can take the day off. Get well soon," he released her from their little debriefing and she nodded before standing up and making her way to the door. Her hand found its way up to her temple again to rub small circles onto it to ease the pain when she left the room whilst the other hand secured the papers beneath her jacket.
She walked out of the front door to their work office, trying to act as causal as possible so Alan wouldn't suspect anything but she honestly didn't know if she did a good job on that. She'd never been a good actor. Nataly breathed out in relief when the wooden doors fell shut behind her. She pulled out the paper and looked took a closer look at them. They seemed pretty old already, the colour slightly yellowish and the corners slightly crumbled or even ripped at some parts. She turned them back and forth, seeing that both papers had a handwritten text on both sides of the papers. It was a handwritten letter for her and she recognised the messy handwriting to be the one of her chef. How could she not when she was the one who always had to type in his reports into the laptop.
She scoffed shortly but the throbbing pain in her forehead was getting worse again so she decided to read it at her apartment after she had taken some pain killers. Staying in front of her office doors to read over a letter she had just stolen from her chef wasn't the best idea to begin with even though it was addressed to her.
She started walking down the hallway to the stairs in order to head upstairs. Conveniently her apartment had been right above her work and as far as she could remember, that had been the reason she had ended up as Alan's sidekick to begin with. He had taken her in and taught her everything she needed to know about being a hero. From what she had seen of him up to now, he was an amazing person who cared so much about everyone's safety and happiness. Then again, he had been lying to her about who she was all those years as well. Was everything else maybe just another lie?
Upon reaching her door she pulled out a key and unlocked her door. When she entered her small apartment she breathed out in relief, her home immediately making her feel safe again and she pulled the door shut. Then she walked over to her kitchen, pulling out a basket with all kinds of meds from a drawer. Placing the papers on the table in order not to accidentally get them wet in the process, she pulled out some Ibuprofen, then got water in order to take the medicine. She gulped down the pill before making her way over to the living room, picking up the letter again on the way before letting herself sink down onto the sofa. Then she began to read,
"My dear Nataly,
I'm sorry for what I've done to you.
You deserve to know the truth. The truth about who you are and your reasons and story behind how you became the most powerful villain out of them all.
When I first met you, you were merely four. They had bought you to me, telling me that you were the one. I hated the idea to begin with. The idea of using an untainted human soul as source for everyone else's happiness. But they had already deleted your existence out of everyone's memories. I was merely the one assigned to make sure you wouldn't die. I had to follow their demands, no matter how horrible they were but I know it's no excuse to what I ended up putting you through.
Years went by and I checked up on you every day trying to keep you company as best as I could. Your grew up more and more and I wish I would've done something way earlier. I wish I wouldn't have allowed them to put you into that machine to begin with but back then I was too weak. Too weak to stand up for those in need. For you.
That machine was constructed in order to feed from your pain and produce a barrier around the city. Within that barrier, no one would come to any harm and everyone would be happy. Besides you that is.
Every day you begged me to let you go, asking why I was doing this to you and when you were 15 I couldn't take it anymore. I destroyed everything down there and pulled you out of that machine. I carried you to the nearest hospital I could find and handed you to one of the nurses who immediately rushed you to the emergency room. Then I went to them and handed myself over, knowing very well what I had done. I had destroyed everyone's peace and happiness because I valued your life over everyone else's. You never deserved any of what they put you through. You were only four when they decided on you after all. You had done nothing wrong.
They only told me that I would have to fix the problem. That I would have to get you and bring you back. I refused at first but they said that if I didn't do it they would just send someone else that wouldn't be as nice to you. Someone that didn't care if you would get hurt or not. I didn't know what to do but when I came back to the hospital you were already gone. You had left and within you the rage against the city and especially me, as I had been the only one you could remember from all those years of torture, had started to boil. I don't blame you for it, I would've thought the exact same way.
You started your revenge, making yourself into a villain in the eyes of the citizens even though you were the victim and I eventually became their hero. I always made sure I wouldn't actually catch you but I had to make sure the people in the city were save as well. They didn't know of their decision. Your rage was directed towards the wrong people.
After several years went past of me not being able to catch you and you terrorizing the city almost on a daily basis they grew annoyed. I tried my best to keep them away from you. I am sorry. I failed.
But after what you did to the city your soul wasn't untainted anymore and they couldn't 'use' you anymore. Honestly when I heard that I was so relieved. But when they decided it would be best to kill you I had to act fast. I ended up suggesting to delete your memories instead and to my surprise they agreed. They let me keep you under my watch while trying to figure out a way to keep the citizens save.
At first I was glad you didn't have to remember those days of torture anymore and that you were finally able to live a normal live but eventually you started getting headaches whenever you ran into something hinting on your past. Sometimes your cries were even worse than when you were still stuck on that machine.
They also kept an eye on the two of us while I taught you how to be a hero and they came up with the method that we are still using till today. Wiping memoires of both the villain and everyone who knew of them so that they can be reintroduced into society safely.
Now if you are reading this that means I won't be alive anymore and you found all those articles about our past fights. I kept every single one of them, hoping it would help you understand your story and as a reminder for me for my sins. I know I should've explained this in person when I was still alive but I was selfish. I didn't want to loose you again.
You were always like my own child for me. Thank you for giving me all those years where I could see you being happy and enjoying life and again, I'm sorry for what I made you go through.
Sincerely, Alan"
Nataly gulped, a heavy feeling in her chest as her breathing quickened, not knowing what she was supposed to think anymore. Everything was too much and her vision started to get blurry due to the tears that welled up in her eyes. Her whole life had been a lie and whoever they were, they were going to pay.

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