Slowly learning that life is okay (GirlxGirl) [COMPLETE]

Ellie - 'Cause there's a spark in you

Ellie woke up abruptly, her eyes shooting open and a hand rising up to her chest. Her hair has glued to her neck and to her forehead.

She looked down at her hands, but they were normal. There was no blood in them.

"Shh, it's okay, kiddo," Joel said. He was sitting beside her in his pajamas, a worried look in his eyes. The bedside lamp was on. "Dreaming of him again?"

Her mouth was dry, so she nodded at him. A part of her felt ashamed that even after all those years, he still had something on her. That she couldn't just forget him.

Joel sighed, his hand beside her knee on the mattress.

"This happenin' a lot?" again, she nodded, still trying to calm her racing heart, "Look, Ellie, I think you should go to a therapist-"

"What? No way," she shook her head. Her voice sounded weird, but Joel found her eyes and he was serious.

"I can't help you like they can, Ellie," he paused, holding her gaze before letting it drop to his hand. "After Sarah's death... It's good to talk to someone."

She was tired of having nightmares with David, of seeing him behind her eyelids when she felt asleep. She was tired of him having a part of her. But a shrink?

But Joel went, and if he thought it was a good idea, maybe she could consider it.

"I'm taking a shower," she said, her voice still hoarse. Joel looked up at her, his eyes full of concern and love breaking through her a little, making her sigh. "I'll think about it, Joel."

He nodded, a soft smile on his lips. "Talking helps, Ellie," he said, standing and walking with her to the corridor. "Call me if you need anything, kiddo."

She nodded before stepping in the bathroom.

Fuck David for doing this to her.

_____

Joel was dressed in one of his best button-ups and his usual caramel jacket as he stood in front of the couch for Ellie to approve.

"Looking old," she said, eyeing him and trying not to smile as he rolled his eyes. She stopped her journaling, "but I'm sure she already knows it."

"I don't know why I ask you," he muttered, checking the hour on his broken watch, "when are y'all leaving?"

She shrugged, yawning and looking back at the TV. "Maybe nine and a half?"

"Ellie," Joel said, crossing his arms on his chest, "it's nine and a half now."

"Wait, what?" She checked the time on her phone and sure enough, she should be leaving. Also, Lucas had called her a couple times."Fuck, why didn't you tell me earlier?"

Joel shook his head in amusement, "I had no way to know, kiddo."

She turned the console off and sprinted inside, slipping out of her sweatpants and into jeans. She put her new hoodie on and brushed her teeth before running back and tying her sneakers and putting on a jacket.

Joel hit her head with his gloves before she left, "hey, be careful, y' hear me?"

"Yeah, yeah, yeah," she picked her keys and smirked at him, "have fun on your date, old man," then she closed the door before he could say anything and ran down the stairs.

"Why didn't you call me?" she questioned Dina as she slipped in the backseat with Lucas.

"I did, but you didn't answer," Lucas showed his screen and maybe she'd been a bit too busy to hear it. She hummed, putting on the seatbelt as Dina sped off.