Hinata
Blood runs down my face.
Static fills my ears.
His face, his angry face.
Keeps pushing me down.
I'm so small, I keep getting squashed.
"You will never be good at volleyball."
"Where the hell have you been for three years."
"Stupid Idiot, thinking your good at something it's pathetic."
It's a dream I keep having, the voices words are still circling around my skull. I go to the bathroom and wash the sweat off my face. I feel kinda a little disappointed I only got 12 strikes yesterday. I want to die, the voices only convinced me more. Instead I grab the blade I keep hidden under one of my floorboards and cut deeply to make sure it bleeds and stings. I always make sure to cut in the same places where no one can see them. I wait for the bleeding to subside a bit before bandaging them up and getting dressed for school. I hope I get more than 12 strikes today.
Seeing as it was a self-harm day, I quickly change in the toilets instead of the club room to make sure none of my teammates questions me about my bandages. When I walk to the gym I see Kageyama approach it as well. If this was a few months earlier, we probably would have raced, it used to be fun. But recently I don't have enough energy to race Kageyama, then practice, then cycle home. Seeing as when we raced I used to make a lot of noise, Kageyama barely notices me as I approach which is great as I appreciate the silence.
When Kageyama finally does notice me when I'm warming up the weird new concept of him being nice to me is still in play. He keeps asking me stupid questions like "How are you?"
"Would like something to eat?" But I remain silent I don't want to give him the satisfaction of answering, so I see how long it takes before he gets annoyed at me and starts shouting at me to answer the goddam questions. To my surprise he doesn't, although it does look like it is extremely difficult for him.
Every time I mess up now, he doesn't shout at me which makes me feel a little guilty of my plan to kill myself. But Tsukishima still insults me so I don't feel that bad.
---------------------------------------------------------
Kageyama
He really is testing my patience, I'm asking him simple questions like "how are lessons going?" He just doesn't answer. It's pissing me off but I can't snap at him or I've broken my promise to be nice to him. Hinata please talk to me, a single word would be nice or just a head nod. I'm trying to decipher his thoughts through the look in his eyes which isn't as easy as it's sounds. His eyes used to shine all the time but now they're duller than a maths lesson. I want to grab him by the scruff of his hair and make him tell me what's going on in his life, but probably make him less inclined to tell me.
---------------------------------------------------------
Hinata
Maybe I'm getting better at volleyball now that I have this incentive. I got 13 strikes today, so yesterday's result was not a fluke but I still can't be sure seeing as it's only been two days. So that's 25 strikes, a quarter of the way there so by an estimate next week I'll be dead. Wow. That's crazy. I wonder if the change in Kageyama is because a weird thing like this, I wonder if he'll still be nice after I'm gone.
VOCÊ ESTÁ LENDO
100 Strikes ~ Kagehina
Fanfic"Three strikes then your out," that's how the saying goes. Hinata thinks that he'll mess up three strikes far too quickly, so he's set himself a bigger target a 100. A 100 strikes, a 100 mess ups, and he'll pay the ultimate price - his life. But the...
