(Basically me re writing smth from a BrewStew video with other stupid jokes of mine.. enjoy??? Ik it's gonna be trashhh.)
(Also sorry abattu in before hand-)
Morosis: Thank for tuning in on 13 o Clock action news, I am Morosis and just in: Firefighters are busy fighting a big ass fire in a apartment building! We have ShadowScorpion on the scene.
Morosis: Shadow what do you have for us?
Shadow in front of the burning building: Well yeah things are looking bad over here. The apartment is completely engulfed in flames, the heat of fire is putting California to shame! And I have no marshmallows to make s'mores
Morosis: That sounds awful Shadow! Are there any survivors?
Shadow: Oh yeah this one chick who smells like overcooked bacon
Abattu: I have a name you kno-
Shadow cutting her off: Ma'am would you like to us what it was like inside that building?
Abattu: Well it was hot...
Shadow: WELL NO SHIT IT'S HOT! The buildings on fire for fucks sake!
Morosis, who just wants to go home already: Shadow, can you ask the girl who smells like overcooked bacon- err I mean the victim what it feels like to lose their shit?
Shadow: sure thing
Shadow now talking to Abattu: Hey, now that your shits on fire what are you going to miss the most?
Abattu: Probably my dog. I have a dog named Tanya
Morosis: Aww that's terrible Shadow, who the fuck names their dog Tanya?
Shadow: I was thinking the same thing Morosis, I thought only strippers were named Tanya!
Morosis: well Shadow you would certainly know that, wouldn't ya?
Shadow: That's for sure Morosis! Can ya tell me what breed it was?
Abattu: She's a Dalmatian
Morosis: Ooooo aint that ironic? Also I do not like Dalmatians. One time I tried to feed my neighbor's Dalmatian and the motherfucker bite my hand!
Shadow: yeah Morosis Dalmatians are quite the assholes
Morosis: If anyone has any info on Tanya the missing stripper- *clears throat* I mean the missing Dalmatian please click the link below!
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=dQw4w9WgXcQ
Shadow: Hold that though Morosis, it appears a firefighter was able to pull the dog from a second story window, saving poor little Tanya's life!
Crab, the fire fighter: Woah this dogs name is Tanya? I know a stripper named Tanya!
Morosis: Wow that is miraculous Shadow, I thought that dog was deader then the fucking" Among Us With the Boys" discord server!
Shadow: yeah I thought so to Morosis!
Shadow: Alright back to you Morosis.
13 O CLOCK ACTION NEWS. WE'LL BE RIGHT BACK
