Leave Me Bleeding [Winter Soldier] I

Memories Fleeting [Chapter 25]

"How crazy would it be for someone to fall in love with something that wasn't real?"
-Gillian Dowell's "Paracosm"

                Ophelia kept her eyes on Bucky, unable to tear them from him. She could sense the pain he was in without even linking with him. Each time she was able to remember her own life because of her path finding, Ophelia thought she was filled with bad luck for having to remember it all; each time she remembered, she didn't just recall the good, it was mostly the bad that flooded her mind. 

           Looking at Bucky struggling to understand what he was and what he had done, she saw now that it was worse to only remember some of it. Having just the bad or just the good was not any better than feeling both; understanding both is what kept them human. 

           The tension in the room was almost unbearable, and Ophelia had no idea on how to ease it. She reached over with her good arm and touched Bucky's arm. She wanted to speak to him, but she knew not what to say. Wrapping her fingers around his wrist, she pulled lightly, as if to bring him closer.

            The man made eye contact with her, a faint half-smile creeping up over his lips. It faded as quickly as it appeared, and Bucky shifted further onto the bed, closer to Ophelia. As there was only one bed in the motel, it was obvious where both Ophelia and Bucky would be sleeping, but neither made a comment about it. Ophelia had no issues with it, but almost doubted that Bucky would even sleep with everything running through his mind.

                As he leaned down on to his side, his head hit the mattress and was level with Ophelia's side. His eyes remained open, and he began to study the blood stains on the gauze wrapped around her torso. His hand came up and gently touched her ribs, careful not to touch where the bruising was, but close to it. Though Ophelia winced, the pain was bearable because it was Bucky's hands on her. Bucky slid his hand around her waist, hovering just above the top of her waist. His hand curved over her hip, pressing the wet cloth down on her wound gently. His intention was not to harm her, but this sudden show of affection had Ophelia's stomach twisting. 

               This had to be what love felt like, but was he feeling it too?

                As Ophelia breathed in through her nose, and out through her mouth to try to handle the pain, she didn't tell Bucky to move. It felt too good having his touch upon her skin like this, without the fear that he was going to kill her because he had been ordered to do so. She pressed her hand on top of his, just to feel him. Turning her head, she looked at the man she loved, wondering if he would ever come back to her. Though he couldn't remember her, there was an obvious connection between the two of them. She began to drift in and out of consciousness, the long days of running and fighting and nearly dying had drained her, but she didn't want to fall asleep in case Bucky was gone the next day.

                "Bucky?" Ophelia whispered after a few minutes had gone by; Bucky was still holding onto her in an almost childlike way.

                "Yes?"

                "I, uhm..." She nibbled her lip; she had wanted to wait until they both had more strength to discuss this, but it just couldn't wait. The thought of him being gone in the morning terrified her, and she wasn't using this to keep him there, but rather to bring him back. He deserved to know. "I do love you... More than a friend."

                "Why can't I remember you?" he asked. "I feel like... I'm supposed to know you, like I'm supposed to be with you."

                Ophelia's breath hitched when he said those words, she momentarily forgot that he did not remember her. "You feel that way?"