Tomorrow's Blues

34. Flirtatious Texts

At school the next day, Ellie wasted no time in getting me alone during our lunch-break to interrogate me. We'd eaten lunch with our other friends, including Zoe, and then Ellie had dragged me away from everybody to one of our study rooms.

"Right." Ellie shut the door behind her, scanning the room to make sure no one was in it. "Sit."

I laughed but perched on the edge of one of the tables, Ellie taking a seat on the table opposite. "I knew this was coming."

"Well, of course you did." She gestured with her hands. "Go."

I knew what she meant. "I don't even know where to begin."

"Just... from whenever you realised you liked Joseph," she told me, folding her arms and waiting.

I gave her a faint smile but began to talk. I explained the late nights we had together, the way Joseph helped me, the jealousy, the almost kisses... but I left out parts, too. Like Joseph's art. That was his and his alone, and I would never share it with anybody unless he wanted me to. I told Ellie about my breakdown that now seemed so long ago, and how Joseph had comforted me. I told her about how hurt I was when I discovered Millie in his shirt at the Moore's house. I told her about the argument Joseph and I had had following that, how we made up, how we'd been so close to kissing that night but I couldn't – because of Harry. I told her about the first time Joseph slept in my bed, and how he told me he was jealous of Harry, and how Harry guessed there was something between Joseph and me when I ended things with him. I told her how I danced around Joseph in my underwear on that drunken night, and she burst out laughing at that. I told her what I said to Joseph at the wedding, when I asked him why he hadn't kissed me yet, and I told her how I marched to his room at the end of the night. Our story was a long one, and it had only just begun.

"Wow," Ellie said with a long exhale after I'd finished. "I mean, wow. Bloody hell." She ran a hand through her hair. "So much has happened. And Alice has no idea?"

I shook my head. "I don't think so." I paused. "Ellie, I feel really bad for asking you to keep this from her. It's not fair on you."

She frowned slightly. "Honestly... I don't mind. Friends keep secrets from friends. I mean, she's kept secrets from us. We can't always know everything about each other."

That was true. I was aware of secrets I was keeping from them. Things I hadn't even told Joseph. "Did Sam say anything about it?"

She shook her head. "Boys are oblivious. I think he has an inkling, but he's keeping it to himself. Smarter than he looks."

I chuckled.

"Ana..." She reached forward and touched my hand. "I know it's not fun keeping secrets from our closest friends. But... Joseph makes you happy, right?"

I nodded once.

"And you, more than anybody I know, deserve to be happy." Ellie was not one to often talk about feelings, so when she did, it was... deep. Sincere. "And I don't want that ruined by Alice knowing. I don't know how she'd react, but for now... it's between us."

I smiled gratefully, letting out a sigh of relief. "Thank you, Ellie." I bit at my bottom lip. "He really does make me happy."

Ellie grinned. "Well, good. I mean, the way you talk about him... you're practically glowing, Ana."

"I've never felt like this before," I admitted. "Never."

She paused, furrowing her eyebrows at me. "Ana..." Her face was scrutinising. "Ana, do you love him?"

Was it that obvious? I looked at her for a moment, pressing my lips together. Finally, I said, "Yeah. I do."

Ellie's eyes widened slightly, but then she smiled. "Wow."