Sonder

Malibu Adventures

"Malibu" Olan tells me

Nodding, Willow and I get out the car with Bentli's leash in one hand and my board in the other. I look around at our surroundings. The sky is dark, street lights are lite, and the only noise you can hear is small chatter between us. 

"So where we going-" I get cut off by the sound of laughter and boards hitting the pavement with wheels rolling off into the distance. Turning around I see that I am left alone with Bentli. Putting my earphones in I began to skate in the direction everyone went. The cold breeze felt wonderful hitting against my skin and through my hair. Beautiful weather of October. Ten minutes pass and I hear someone skating beside me, I look only to see Nico with a big grin holding his hand out to me. I take it and we skate hand in hand.

"hi"

"hey"

There is a silence between us. It wasn't awkward or anything. The only noises you can hear were our feet hitting the pavement every time we kicked, our wheels rolling fast, and  the angelic voice of Daniel Caesar playing from my earphones. If you were to listen very closely you would be able to hear me trying to catch my breath.

Eventually we catch up with everyone and sat down at this empty park. Everyone indulging in conversation while I just stare at the tree leaves swaying in the wind while petting Bentli on my lap. My thoughts begin to suffocate me a bit. The constant guilt I am facing of Ryder hiding his sadness from me. I begin to think, what if I act ignorant to everyone around me? An hour passes and everyone is smoking now. Nico sits besides me and offers me his jacket, I decline.

"Your'e shivering, take it." He tells me. Which I comply to while leaning against him for support.

"I love the fog." He breaks the silence. 

"The way it can just engulf your body and people aren't able to see you for miles. Just brings me comfort by being surrounded by nothing but yet everything. " Nico admits.

Its times like these where he seems more like himself. Letting his guard down.

I try to force out a small smile. Sad that I couldn't give a genuine one. 

I feel him relax as if he was so tense at what my response would have been.

Everyone started to get up and one by one they are all gone riding off into the distance. Nico joining them, I am left alone once again.  I eventually decide to get up also, dusting myself off I check my phone which reads of a time of 12pm. I see that I've got a missed text from Ryder.

Ryder🥰:

Hey, can you pick me up. I don't want to be alone right now.

pls :)

sent an hour ago

Me:

IM SO SORRY. I am on my way now. Send me your location

Ryder🥰:

Ryder has sent there location.

I turn into full fledge rescue Ryder mission mode. I send a quick text to the group chat that I will be heading back to the house early due to not feeling so well and that I'll  be taking Bentli with me. No response. I set my board down and begin skating to my car . Since it would take me a while to get back to my car I put my earphones back in and begin playing BLONDE. Just me riding in the morning fog listening to frank ocean, what an ideal morning.

----

I see my car in the distance and see the two other cars everyone took were still here. So I am assuming they went to hang out at someones house. Making it back to my car I begin making my way towards Ryder which was going to be a drive. Making it onto the highway I kind of push the speed limit just a tad bit. While in the car I turn on one of my playlists called 'shea butter bby' and just really enjoyed the music. Like really listened to the words and what instrument were playing and then not. When was the last time I actually listened to music I question myself. Arriving to the location I see Ryder sitting alone at a bus stop with his head low.

I pull up in front of him, turned off the music, and parked. Getting out I jog over to him.

"ryder" I whisper his name as if I was afraid someone was going to hear me.

He just sat still making no movement or noise. I take a seat next to him and decide to hug him. Not knowing or understanding what happened prior to me arriving here. I felt as if he just needed some type of physical contact right now. Its been ten minutes of me stroking his back. I ask if he's ready to go home and I get no response. It's like he is empty.  He doesn't break away from the hug nor does he utter a word he just nods. Walking him to the passenger side, he gets in while I make my way over to the drivers side. I want to question him so bad but I know that it is not the right time.

I set the address back to our house into my phone and I hear a sniffle come from beside me, I look and see that his head is still low. Taking the car out of park and into drive I turn on some music to fill in the silence. I put on my sad playlist. (Do you guys like happy or sad music when you're down?) He lowers it and tilts his head back. Letting out a loud sigh I hear him begin to cry. I am relieved that he didn't try holding it in, it only hurts worse when you hold it in. Using my free hand I take his and just grasp onto it, letting him know that it's okay. I made a stop at the gas station due to wanting a few snacks and an energy drink that was needed for the drive I had ahead of me. Checking my phone I read the time 2:20 am, I quietly let out a sigh and continue driving.

Being ten minutes away from our exit on the freeway I decide to let down all the windows and turn the music up as my favorite song began playing. Gap in the clouds plays, the way I have been obsessed with that song for a couple of years. 

"Beautiful mind between those eyes" I sang while nudging his shoulder trying to get a smile out of him. My attempt was a failure. 

With these next lyrics coming up I am indeed going to make him smile. 

"It's cold out but those blue eyes and smile. Oh that smile" I sing while grasping his face and smile at him which earns a genuine smile from him. 

"Your stupid" He tells me laughing.

Finally arriving at the house. I park the car and we sit in silence. Three minutes later he opens his door and then opens mine. I thank him and let the dog out. He heads to his room and I head to mine letting him know that I'll go to his when I'm out the shower. Which he agrees to. I walk towards my room but then hear footstep's coming up the stairway. I freeze knowing that its only Ryder and I in the house. It can't be Bentli because I would be able to hear his nails against the wood. The footsteps got closer and I creak open my door slowly to see Nico arriving to my door. I open it wider for him to come in.

"You're finally back" he tells me while flopping down on my bed.

"Yup. What are you doing back?" I ask

"I sorta got bored so I chose to come back on my own but don't worry Willow is safe over there. Her brother had went over" he tells me. I feel as if that isn't the whole truth to why he came back but I let it go.

I nod while looking for my phone charger. Looking under the pile of blankets I feel a pair of hands on my waist pulling me down and a pair of lips laying kisses on my neck. I give up on looking for the charger and give in . Cupping his face gently, he begins speeding up the kissing, trying to move my hips with his hands trying to create some friction. I soon break away from him and look for my charger finally finding it, I hook up my phone.

"I'm gonna shower" I tell him while exiting my room.

He gives me a soft nod while giving me a kiss on my forehead and heads out my room also

------

How are you?

Has anyone asked you that recently?

How are the chapters so far, I honestly don't know how to feel about them and the story.