north star (knj)

chapter nine

And when you decide it's your time to arrive
I've loved you for all of my life
And nothing could stop me from giving a try
I've loved you for all of my life

More - Halsey

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Two VLives, a phone call with Mikka, a dance lesson for "Underworld", and a late dinner at a BBQ joint later, Hanna and I headed to BTS' dorm for Yoongi's birthday. The day's events had drained me, but I willed extra energy into my step as we walked through BTS' luxurious apartment complex. I had promised Namjoon I would try harder to be friendly. Yoongi's birthday was a perfect opportunity for me to prove my word.

But I was tired. I had only been in Seoul for half a week, but keeping up with the schedules of the biggest Korean idols was exhausting. Any more eon-long dance and singing rehearsals and I would snap in half.

Beside me, Hanna let out a low sigh. As we walked, she hunched her shoulders and kicked pieces of gravel to the side of the path.

"Tired?" I asked.

"No." Her eyebrows pinched together.

"Is something wrong?"

She itched her wrist, frowning. "Can I talk with you for a minute?"

Apprehension kneaded through me. Earlier, when I had told Hanna about Yoongi's birthday, she had told me she was excited for the party. Now, she seemed different. Hesitant. The normal starstruck wonder in her eyes was absent.

"Of course," I said, nodding.

Hanna exhaled heavily. "I shouldn't be here."

"In Korea?"

"No, no." She shook her head. "It's literally my job to be with you here in Korea. I'm saying I shouldn't be here. At BTS' dorm."

"But didn't you eat here last night for dinner?" Socializing may not have been my forte, but I was struggling more than usual following Hanna's problem.

"Yes, but that was a mistake. It's...well. Um. It's complicated." She bit her lip. "I was told I shouldn't do anything with BTS after work hours."

I raised an eyebrow. "I know Mikka can be a little controlling, Hanna, but I can talk to her for you. You should have fun while you're here."

"No, no. Mikka didn't tell me this."

"Who did, then?"

Hanna's fidgeting increased as we rounded a bend in the path, and a mixture of relief and stress colored her expression. "Oh, we're almost there. Um. Lyra...can we talk later? It's not something I want to talk about around the guys."

"Yeah, no problem." I reached over and squeezed her shoulder. "Anytime you want to talk, I'm here."

"Thanks. I appreciate it."

Beyond a brightly lit, small garden, BTS' apartment unit welcomed us. The modern, lavish building was built from clean lines and wide windows, with multiple sets of balconies overlooking the hillside at downtown Seoul.

A minute after ringing the doorbell, Jimin greeted Hanna and I at the front door. I had barely stepped over the threshold and taken off my shoes before I was swept up in Jimin's arms and ushered further inside with a "Welcome home, love". I laughed and tipped my head against Jimin's shoulder, and some of Hanna's uneasy expression softened at the exchange.

"He's been asking me all day about terms of endearment," Hanna said behind us as we headed upstairs. "I didn't know they were for you."

"Someone was eventually going to realize I'm not a total miserable grump," I mused, tossing my hair over my shoulder.