north star (knj)

chapter eleven

I don't care, go on and tear me apart
I don't care if you do ooh ooh
'Cause in a sky, 'cause in a sky full of stars
I think I saw you

A Sky Full of Stars - Coldplay

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"And after that you..."

"After that we talked for a bit more, and then I fell asleep," I said, sitting down on a park bench with a bemused smile. "What else was I supposed to do?"

Over the phone, Leo scoffed. "Maybe say, 'Oh Namjoon, on second thought I would love to sleep in your bed tonight. Actually, scratch the sleeping part. Let's just have sex instead for hours and hours until I can't feel my –"

"Leo!" I exclaimed. My shout drew attention from passersby, so I lowered my tone. "Leo. First off, I'm your sister, so please stop talking about me like that. Secondly, Namjoon and the rest of BTS are normal human beings and exist for more than just your weird sex fantasies. I know this is asking for a lot, but can you be normal for two seconds?"

"Normal is boring," Leo said. "But fine. I'll keep the innuendos to a minimum."

"Thanks. Anyways, we chatted. I slept. I woke up with Hanna a few hours later and we left for our hotel." I pulled my scarf around my neck tighter. "BTS has an award show tonight, so they're busy all day rehearsing for it. Hanna and I have the day off."

"That's nice." Leo paused. "How are you today?"

I knew his question carried more weight than a normal pleasantry. The park around me seemed to still as I remembered what day it was, what had happened ten years ago. Talking with Namjoon last night had eased some of my anxiety, but now it all came back in a painful rush.

Dragging my boot through the light snow on the ground, I said, "Alright, all things considered. I wish I could be with you right now, but some things can't be helped."

"I'm alright, Lyra. I'm just over here in Los Angeles, painting away my miseries until my sister returns home and we can be sappy about our dead dad together." He sighed dramatically. "But alas, she chose seven cute Korean boys over me."

"Ha ha. Very fun –" My foot paused as realization dawned on me. "Los Angeles? I thought you were supposed to be in Boston for an art show."

"Oh. Right." Papers rustled over the phone. "It got cancelled. I don't know why."

I huffed. "That blows. You could be here with me and we wouldn't have to be apart today."

"Yes, but I think Dad would get it. You're in Korea, working on a hit single that will blow international record sales out of the water. And I'm the next Picasso. We're doing alright for ourselves," Leo said.

I looked around the park, admiring how this morning's snow flurry had coated everything in a blanket of shimmering white. Seoul's neon lights flickered in colorful bursts. Children ran through the park, launching snowballs at one another and ducking behind forts as they took advantage of what was likely one of the last snowfalls of the winter. The mouthwatering aroma of the nearby coffee shop floated towards me.

I was cold, and I missed my brother, but I was content here.

"Yeah," I breathed. Something warm tingled in my chest. "We're doing alright."

Keys jingled on Leo's end. "Hey, I have to go. Um, some friends want to meet up and I'm already running late."

"Okay. I love you," I said.

"Love you too," Leo said. "Do me a favor and keep flirting with Namjoon without thinking you're actually flirting with him."

Before I could protest, Leo hung up.