Love Me | Series Book #1

FORTY THREE

Light filtered through my eyelids, pulling me back into reality. My vision was hazy as I struggled to blink my eyes open, which had crusted over during sleep. As the shapes of my bedroom became apparent from the in the shadows, my attention landed on the device that was beaming light through the room, cradled in Chase's hand. The same hand that, it took seconds for me to realize,  was no longer attached to my own.

His fingers padded swiftly over the screen, and I shifted my attention to see that he wore a solemn expression – a replica of the one that had clouded his face when I'd thrown myself into his arms on the front yard earlier. As I sat forward, catching the sliver of the moonlight pouring through the blinds, it occurred to me, just how many hours had flown by since that incident had taken place.

He lowered his phone, at the sensation of me stirring beside him, and shifted his eyes on me.

"What time is it?" I asked, turning away, as my hair slid over my shoulders, forming a wall between us. I was far too aware of the pitiful state of my appearance, although I don't know why I felt the sudden urge to shield myself, considering everything was out in the open now.

"Half-past six," he said. "Your brother came by to check in on you about twenty minutes ago."

My heart slammed into my chest, as a recap of the full day ran through my mind. Dad and Aaron had returned from his tournament...and both of them had a front-row seat to the debacle that had taken place on our front lawn earlier, yet only one of them cared enough to check-in.

I could only imagine the rage that my fathered harbored towards me right now; having left the game at half-time for an emergency he didn't even think was worth investigating.

I pushed the covers off my body as I swung my legs over my bed.

"Where are you going?"

I froze as my feet made contact with the carpeted floor. Where was I going? It wasn't as though I was actually on my way to voice these gripes aloud to his face.

"I-" I started without a sure answer to his question. "I don't know"

The resentment that had been building inside of me for 18 years, was like pressure on the cap of a freshly shaken coke bottle. Just one twist away from an eruption. 

But as I ran over the thoughts in my head, searching for words that I would form my lips to speak... I realized I had nothing left to say to him, just as he had nothing to say to me. We had mutually selected silence as the language of choice in our relationship. He pretended he was blind to the problem areas in my life, and I pretended that I numb to how much it hurt.

As I sunk back into the mattress, the sound of Drake's Best I Ever Had sliced through the air, startling my heart. It didn't occur to me that it was Chase's ringtone until he swiped the off button on his phone.

"You're not going to answer that?" I asked, watching him as he slid it into the pocket of his jeans. He shook his head, avoiding my eyes.

"It's okay." I tried to convince him "You can go if you need to get home. I'll be fine."

"It's Leah," he said, brushing aside my words as if I hadn't spoken. "It totally slipped my mind. I was supposed to give her a ride today."

"You should go, Chase. Really I'll be okay."

"Kaya, I'm not leaving you alone."

"What do you think is going to happen? He's not going to show up here. Not after yesterday. Beside's I'm not really alone. My dad's right down the hall, and my mom should be back from work any minute."