Lonely

Thirteen

Mike

It was the next day early in the morning and Derek was up throwing up. Wanting to see if he was ok I got up and walked to the bathroom getting on my knees rubbing his back.

"What's wrong bub" I asked him as he came up to look at me. "I don't know I was sleeping then I just started throwing up" He told me and I nodded. "I'ma go get you some water ok" He nodded and I got up and came back with the water.

"Gargle this in your mouth spit it out" While he did that I wet a warm washcloth and whiped his mouth after I was finish he brushed his teeth. "You feel better" I asked and he nodded. "I think so" After that we went back to sleep.

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The next time I woke up Derek was still sleeping so I leaned over kissing his forehead softly but that ended up in him turning around and clinging onto my arm letting me know he was awake.

"D let go" I said and he just stayed there unbothered. "Baby get up" I said and he shook his head. "Bea I have to go feed Mejesty" I wispered kissing on his shoulder that was exposed.

I continued to kiss on his shoulder until I got to his neck then to his lips kissing him softly pulling away but he bit my lip pulling me back getting on top of me.

I reached down putting my hands in his sweats cupping his ass in my hands. I squized it a little making him moan giveing me access to the inside of his mouth. I sat up on the headboard with him still on my lap and kissed his chest leaving purple hickeys all over the soft light skin.

I kissed over the tattoo of my name as he played in my hair moaning softly. I pulled away from his chest going to his neck again but not abusing it just kissing it.

"Mike please" He wispered in my ear."please what baby" I said biting his ear. "I want yo-" He was cut off by a loud bark.

We looked at the door and Mejesty was standing there with her bowl. "Mmcht" Derek smacked his teeth going to the bathroom making me laugh. "Alright girl let's go get you some food" I said picking up the dog and her bowl going downstairs.

After feeding her Derek was done with his shower and watching TV on the couch. "What do you want for breakfast" I asked him coming in the living room. "I wanted dick but pancakes is fine" He said and I chuckled grabbing his hand pulling him up.

"Come help me" I said and he shrugged as we walked in the kitchen. "Ok first thing I want you to do is get a bowl and rinse it out" I told him and he nodded. "Now come here" I said motioning him to come to me.

I put the bowl down and took out the Pancake Mix. "How do I even know how much to poor" he asked and I got behind him helping him poor the batter inside the bowl. "Like that" I said Smiled. After that I put water in the bowl and let him stir untill the chunks were gone.

"Now the pan is already hot so when you poor it don't get scared" I told him and he nodded. "But How much do I poor " He asked. "Poor in the middle of the pan and I'll tell you when to stop" he nodded Once again picking up the wet mix and poored it into the pan.

"Like that" He asked and I smiled. Since he poored it I fixed it and we just continue doing that until we were done. I got the plates and we pu the pancakes on them sitting down at the table. "How do they taste" I asked as he took a bite.

"Amazing" he answered and I Chuckled. "Well I'm glad" I said eating my food as well. "What are we gonna do about the shadow I seen" he asked bringing me out of my thoughts. "I don't know yet but don't worry about it to much ok" I told him and he nodded.

"But what if it comes back" he asked now giving me his full attention. "D I'm telling you don't worry about it" I said grabbing his hand. "I got you alright" I told him and he looked away. "And looked where that got you last time" He said before pulling away. I looked at him before looking down.

"Derek what happened to me is not your fought-" he cut me off. "Really because last time I checked I was the opp who got you into that shit I was the person who got you cought up in my bs the only problem you had was with the gang shit and Mattia everything else was because of me we've only been together for going on two years now and we've went threw hell in only this past year" He said looking at me.

"I didn't want this for us I don't want this for our future children this life that were living is not ok I wanna marry you Micheal not have to barry you six feet under because you wanna protect me over something that is probably happing because of me just look at it you wouldn't have killed Mattia if it wasn't for me, you wouldn't have got raped if it wasn't for me, you wouldn't have felt guilty if it wasn't for me, you wouldn't have left if it wasn't for me, you wouldn't have got ran over if it wasn't for me all this pain I've caused you is because of me and I'm sorry for that we are toxic for each other and you know this but I would never leave because I love you to much to see you hurt again because of me" was the last thing he said before getting up from the table and walking upstairs.

Once I heard the guest room door close I looked down as tears slipped from my eyes soon I was full on crying. I whiped and whiped but they still came.

I just got up grabbing my Key's and left I didn't care if I only had on sweat pants and my slides I just wanted to go and the place I went to was my mother's grave.

Sitting down I just cried. "Why did you leave me mama why did you have to go" I cried harder. "I need you I don't know what to do" I mumbled. "Please come back to me" I wispered Looking at here tomb stone.

I'm here baby and mama loves you very much and I'm sorry you have to go threw this but you have D and yes I know things are not going as you guy's planed but you'll get threw it, together.

I heard a voice say in my ear that sounded slot like her making me cry harder. Soon I stop and just sat there before I felt a body press against me. " I'm sorry about earlier" I heard him say and I grabbed his hands. "It's ok D" I wispered laying my head on his chest.

"She would have loved you" I mumbled smilling a little. "She would always talk about who I had a crush on just to make me laugh when I was down she'll even give me cookies with alot of cinnamon to give to them if they ever rejected me" I said Chuckling lightly. "But that all stopped when my father became don but I don't wanna talk about that" I said and he nodded. "It's fine and it sounded like your mother had a great soul I guess that's where you get it from" He clooed and I looked up.

"I guess so but I'm getting cold so can we go now" I asked and he nodded getting up and with that we went home.

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Gm🙂