This Side of Pain

Smiles and Sleep

Colton's POV

    We get up from the table, Maggie with her arms folded across her chest as we wave goodbye to the nice woman who payed for our meal and leave the diner, me holding the door open for the two of them.

    I walk Ben towards his car and open the door for Maggie and step back as Ben helps her in. I wave to them before going to my own car after making sure that they're safe and getting in. I set my to go to box in my pass get seat before I turn on the car and secure my seat belt.

    Pulling out of the parking lot, I look both ways before I turn on to the street and turn up the music that I'm listening to in the car, a few cars away from Ben's in front of me.

     Even though things didn't go as planned and they still might not after this, I still had a good time and if I didn't know any better, I would say that Ben had just as much fun as I did. I had gotten nierbuhs at first when he had suddenly shut down but the more I talked about myself and the things that happened over the years, the more he opened up as well.

     Looking back on things, I didn't learn anything about him besides the fact that he's not from the south and that only stuck with me because he doesn't know what grits are.

     No self respecting Southerner can tell me that they don't why they are at all.

     And while I wish I had learned things about him that went deeper than the trivial things, I'm only grateful that he even went on this date and stayed as long as we did. Even Maggie seemed to have fun, giggling at the jokes we made and making her case as much as she could.

    While I don't know much about Ben, one thing I do know and will never try to take away from him is that he is a good father.

     The drive home isn't that far, thankfully because I'm frankly exhausted. I've been anxious and exhausted over this date for the past few days, and then I ran around the city after work to get ready for it.

    I am more than ready to shed my clothes and fall face first into my bed after a pretty good first month of school.

    I finally get to the apartment complex and when I do, Ben is getting Maggie out of the car, the little girl up in his arms having fallen asleep in the car despite her protests that she wasn't sleepy when we were T the diner. I chuckle as I find a parking spot a few paces away and turn off my car.

    I grab my food from the next seat over and get out, walking towards the stairs that Ben parked in front of. He leads the way up the stairs and I follow to make sure that the two of them don't slip and fall, and that I'm there to catch them if they do.

    We all make it up the stairs safely and I see Ben struggling with the keys and food in hand while trying not to jostle Maggie. "Do you want me to unlock the door for you?" I ask, knowing that he probably won't but unable not to offer. Ben stiffens and turns towards me before he sighs and let's the keys hang.

    Since there's only four it's not hard to figure out which are his for the apartment and I unlock the door, pushing it open for the two to come in.

   I twist the keys to the other side before placing them right inside the door on the table. "Thanks for the date. I hope you have a good night. Both of you." I tell him and he formed as if confused as I go to close the door.

     "You don't want to come in?" He asks, not as an offer but in such surprise that I can't take offense to it.

     "No. This is your safe place. Mine is next door." I tell him with a shi rug and he just stares at me, his face open for the first time but there isn't any distinct emotion on it as he just stares as of confused.

      "You're a strange human." He tells me finally and I shrug my shoulder. 

      "I'm okay with that." I admit and I pull the door closed. "Good night." I tell them before it click shuts and I make sure it's locked before I walk the couple steps towards my apartment, taking out my own keys and unlocking the door before going inside.

     For once it's cold and empty and while I love Emma like a sister, I'm grateful for the silence.

     Today didn't go how I thought it was, and while I thought I would be sad going out without a guaranteed second date, I find myself feeling satisfied not just with how the date went but with life in general.

    I walk towards the back and vein taking off my clothes, setting them in my pile on the floor until I'm down to my boxers, leaving my hair in a bun since I did it this afternoon.

    I pull my covers back and lay in bed before I smile at myself.

     Because I've made progress.

     Because I'm in a good part of my life right now.

      And while I know that things won't always be this easy when it comes to work and relationships and literally nothing else in the world, I'm happy with the way my life is right now, and my only hope is to add two very special pieces into a permanent fixture.

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Filler chapter. didn't have motivation to write more. love you all

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