Down For The Ride (Jonathan Toews)

18~ Staying

Jonathan

You know that feeling you get when you're helpless? When you're watching everything slowly start to unravel and you can't stop it. You want so bad to be the answers to what's going on, but you just can't seem to know what's best. So you sit there, silent, and you watch things unfold. You're useless as everything continues to crumble to the ground.

That's exactly how we were feeling right now.

The NBA shut down operations after a player tested positive for corona virus right after he mindlessly wiped his infected germs over everything. Now players on his team are getting sick and to prevent anything else from happening they are taking a break to see what is best for everyone. People weren't taking this serious so now things are beginning to shut down. The MLB was close to a shut down too as more and more sites are coming up positive.

And all of this after we watched the rest of the world fall to this same virus. We knew this was coming and people didn't want to do anything. I don't want to give up hockey either, it brings me as much joy as it does the fans. Even when we suck. But to think that this could have been stopped or controlled and it wasn't pisses me off. We sat by and watched this virus dictate our life and now, now it might be too late.

I toss my phone to the side as I let out a long sigh. Things seem to be getting worse and worse. Chicago's cases were getting bad because there's a international airport and people come here on vacations. We were already slowly becoming the epicenter of this... this meltdown and I wanted no part in it.

Sadly there wasn't much I could do to help. I can wear a mask but it doesn't matter if no one else does. I'm a man of science and I know what comes next. And I know I'm not going to like it.

"Well the good news is that Carter is not sick and he made it home safe and sound. He's going to hang out there until something else happens" Bri explains as she comes out of her room.

"Are you joining him" I wonder as she looks at me questionably.

"What do you mean" she asks.

"I mean if we get locked down are you going to go home" I question.

"I can't... he took my room" she mumbled and I laugh.

"I'm sure he would give it up if he needed to" I assure her.

"Naw, I think he deserves the biggest room since he still has college classes to do. Plus my dad has asthma and I don't want to risk anything, the less people going in and out of that house the better. So if you let me I would love to stay" she claims.

"Of course I want you to stay" I insist. "I just don't want to keep you from your family in case this trend keeps spiraling out of control and you won't be able to leave."

"Thank you for thinking of what is best for me. But I truly believe I should stay. We don't know what happens next, whether it's the end of the lives we knew or nothing but a bunch of nothing. Whatever it is, I would really like to do it here, with you. I know my family will be fine without me. They're strong and they have each other. I have you" she claims.

"What if something happens" I ask.

"Something always happens"she chuckles. "But life is just one thing after another. We have no control over what happens to us, a lot of times we won't even get a reason why it happens. But we do control what we do after the fact and that's what we are gonna have to do" she says.

"Well I guess as long as I have you it couldn't be too bad" I smirk as she rolls her eyes.

"Just you wait" she warns.

She goes out to lunch with her manager so they can get some plans lined up with a lot of her things getting cancled and I get ready for a home game. Quite possibly the last game for a while. A lot of NHL teams share rinks with the basketball teams in their cities, us included, so I can't imagine it would be long before we lose hockey too. With so much unpredictability for the future I wasn't ready to commit to anything. Not even the uncertain.

I decide to stop pouting and go into the rink a little early. See what everyone else is hearing and figure out what happens next.

I walk in to find Stan and Rocky sitting there talking in one of the conference rooms us guys hang out in when we're here this early.

"Sorry" I say as I plan to go chill out in a different room.

"Actually Jonny, can you stay for a minute" Stan wonders.

I let out a sigh as I walk back into the room. My relationship with the front office is complicated. For five years no one was doing it better than them. They made the right moves and was rewarded for it. They brought three championships and countless hall of fame players to the city of Chicago. But then they started trading guys, guys like Panarin and Danault who was great here and went on to be even better when we got something a little bit less overwhelming in return. And I love Saad but we had the Breadman locked up for two more years, the trade could have waited. That plus the fact that they don't really communicate with us players when it comes to big things like firing Joel has strained the relationship these past few years. It's been rough for everyone but no matter what this is where I wanted to be.

So I walk back in and see what they were talking about.

"Thanks for staying. We wanted your thoughts about this virus" Rocky claims and I raise my eyebrow.

"I feel like that's a question for doctors and health experts, not a hockey captain" I admit.

"We want to know what is being said around the locker room, what the guys are saying" Stan admits.

If he actually talked to us for a little he would probably know by now.

"We're Kinda expecting the worst. We want to play, we want to finish this season but not at the expense of our fans and our health. If it isn't a good idea to be playing then we shouldn't. We can't play in the league if half the players are sick" I insist.

"If this shuts things down how will you keep the team together" he asks and I furrow my eyebrows.

"Isn't that your job" I ask and the room grows silent. I didn't intend for that to be out loud but hey, can't take it back now. "I mean- I can keep in contact and make sure everyone gets home if that's where they want to be or have a place to stay here in the city. I am staying no matter what" I assure them.

"Alrighty, thank you for your time. I'm sure we will be talking to you again soon" Rocky claims.

That'll be a first...