𝑺𝒑𝒆𝒏𝒄𝒆𝒓 𝑹𝒆𝒊𝒅 𝑶𝒏𝒆𝒔𝒉𝒐𝒕𝒔

Lost Chance (Part 2)

y/n stumbled as she walked, sobs were caught in her throat as she stormed further and further away from the love of her life. Her head was swarming with a number of emotions, the rage that once flowed through her veins was slowly diffusing leaving nothing but guilt. Her thoughts were interrupted by a low, heart wrenching scream coming from Spencer's direction, her heart felt as if it had been ripped from her chest knowing it was her fault. She thought back to the look in his eyes when she said she didn't love him anymore, his once gleeful and boyish expression diminishing into a look of pure hurt, as if all the good in his life had been torn from him on the spot.

Y/n knew she didn't mean what she said, she was hurt and the only thing she could thing to do was to say she didn't love him anymore when al she wanted to do was embrace him and tell him how much she loved him. Just as she was about to turn back she realised that she was right outside her door. Y/n forced the keys into the door and as soon as it was open she collapsed to her knees.

Cries and sobs wracked her body, tears and mascara running down her cheeks in rapid succession. Her lungs felt as if they were made of lead as she heaved in heavy breaths, her head was pounding and her hands were shaking violently. Y/n practically dragged herself into the bathroom, the cool tiles making her to shake even more, she twisted the tap to start the water and finally looked at herself in the mirror.

Her hair was tangled and knotted from running her hands through it, her cheeks were swollen and stained with mascara. Y/n tore her eyes from her rugged reflection and began to undress, she turned the bath off and slowly climbed in, wincing at the temperature of the water. Y/n could hear her phone ringing from beside her yet couldn't bring herself to answer, almost like a wave washed over she suddenly felt exhausted.

Her mind finally felt calm as her eyes began to droop, the smell of vanilla and gentle popping of bubbles lulling her closer and closer to the blissful oblivion that was approaching. Y/n could feel herself slipping further and further into the water, she knew that she had to get out yet her limbs seemed to be weighed down, part of her was desperate to leave the water whilst another was pleading to allow the impending darkness to consume her, allow the water to wash away the guilt that was weighing on her mind. Y/n was aware of the water as it encompassed her, she could feel it seeping into her nose as she fully submerged yet it wasn't painful. To y/n she was simply drifting to sleep, letting her unusually tired body and mind finally slip into the serenity of the dark, letting the only sound be silence.

Her phone stopped ringing only moments ago, she could make out the figure standing in her doorway, the figure seemed to be yelling her name but it was muffled by the water in her ears. The person rushed to her side but before she could call back out the anticipated darkness took over.

••••

Spencer watched as she strode off, his heart cracking with each step. He could hear the bushed whispers coming from around him, part of him knee he had to let her go but there was still a tiny speck of hope in his mind that perhaps she was lying. Spencer grasped onto that hope as he pulled his phone out, he stared at it for a moment, unsure of what to do, the screen suddenly lit up but instead of y/n it was Hotch calling.

"Dr Reid" he croaked out, his throat was still aching from the screaming and crying.

"Reid, have you seen y/n? She hasn't been answering her phone" Spencer could hear the slight concern in his voice as he spoke. Reid gulped as he began explaining what happened to Hotch, his chest felt heavy as he replayed the events, the nervousness evident in both their tones as they conversed.

"I want you to go make sure she's okay" Hotch commanded although Spencer had a ready begun to practically sprint to y/n's house, he cursed his physical unfitness as he quickly lost his breath. Spencer agreed with Hotch before hanging up and clambering up the steps to y/n's door.

He knocked gently at first but quickly began pounding when no one answered, he tested the door handle and luckily it was unlocked, Spencer began frantically calling y/n's name yet there was still no answer. He dashed in and out of each room, his head was spinning and his eyes were once again streaming down his face. Spencer stop his search when his shoes splashed into a small puddle at his feet, his tears fell even faster, dripping off his swollen face and combing with the water on the ground.

He was frozen. Only moving when he hear a quiet splash in the bathroom, when he reached the door he almost screamed at the sight. Y/n was fully submerged in the water, eyes slowly closing. By the time he had reached her she was completely unconscious, Spencer hauled her out of the water and began performing CPR, the tears in his eyes making it near impossible to see y/n.

"Come on y/n I can't lose you" he pleaded as he continued the procedure, his already broken heart seemed to break even further as she was still unresponsive.

Y/n suddenly began coughing and spluttering up water, Spencer let out an overjoyed sigh as her eyes opened and she looked up at him. He quickly wrapped her in a towel, holding her as he possibly could.

"I'm so sorry" she began crying but Spencer simply shushed her and held her closer for this may have been the last time he could ever do so.

He suddenly felt y/n's hands on either side of his face and once again her lips were on his, the pair both melted into it, her could feel her smile as they kissed and had to refrain from grinning like a child.

"I didn't mean it" she choked on her words as she pulled away, Spencer gave her a warm smile and he could her y/n release her still laboured breath, "I know".

"I love you" y/n seemed nervous as she anticipated his response, his grin grew to a ridiculous size before he began littering her face with kisses, y/n giggled and tried to stop him but he was persistent in his attack.

"I love you too" he said between pecks, a huge weight was lifted off both of their chests as they sat on the floor, dripping wet, but neither cared.

They were happy.