i'll do my best // muke

I should hate you

Michael's POV.

I kept my eyes closed, but I immediately frowned once I heard small sobs coming from Luke's mouth. He wasn't laying in my arms anymore, so I peeked open one of my eyes. He was sitting on the ground with his back resting on the side of the bed. I placed my hand on his shoulder. "Luke?" I asked. He turned around, and I was surprised by his actions. He got up on the bed, and crawled over to me. He laid down in my arms, and buried his head in my chest. I wrapped my arms around his small body, and held him close to me as his crying calmed down.

"I shouldn't like being in your arms. I really shouldn't." He whispered. I rubbed his back softly as we laid in silence. It seemed like he had fallen back to sleep, or maybe just resting, but I pulled the blankets over his body, but kept him close to me.

He looked up to me, and bit his lip. His eyes momentarily went to my lips, but he blushed and looked down instead. "Luke.." I whispered. He looked back up, red still tinting his cheeks. I pecked his lips once, to see if he was okay with this. He leaned his body onto mine more, and open his eyes a little. "Do it again." He whispered, and I smiled, looking down at him.

I pressed my lips to his softly, and placed my hand on one of his cheeks. I felt his hands on my neck, and he rolled over on top of me.

I heard the door open, and he quickly jumped off of me.

I sighed once I saw a lady that was probably his mum.

"Luke?" She asked sternly.

"Michael. Go. Please." He whispered, and I saw his eyes filling with tears once again. "I'll be at Jacks house." I whispered, and he nodded. I left quickly, and ran over to the house beside his. Me and Jack were close, so I didn't really have to knock.

I ran upstairs and saw him playing video games in his room. "Hey man." He said as I ran over to the window. I could see clearly what was happening to Luke, and It wasn't a pretty sight. His mum hit him like no mum should. "Dude.." I heard Jack sigh as he stood beside me. "He was actually serious when he said all of that stuff." Jack realized. I nodded, and kept my eyes glued to the window. I would go over there to help Luke, but I really can't. He wanted me to leave, and it would be different if it were his dad: I can't hit a woman.

I saw her yelling at him, as he flinched backwards. I sighed in relief as she slammed the door. I saw him look back towards the window, and I waved at him slightly. He looked down at the ground, but I saw him walk out of his room.

"Dammìt." I mumbled, and I looked back at Jack.

"I think I might actually like Luke. And that's the problem. He doesn't trust me anymore. He still let's me hold him and everything since I told him how sorry I was, but it's just not the same. He told me every secret he had and I blew it. He told me stuff that nobody else was supposed to know. I can't believe I would even think to go along with that stupid prank." I said, and placed my head in my hands.

The doorbell rung, and Jack left the room to go get it.

I laid down on his bed, and rubbed my hands all over my face. I heard the door open, but I kept my eyes closed until I felt a small shake on my arm. I saw Luke kneeled beside the bed. I turned over so we were face to face. I wiped the tears falling from his eyes. "Come here." I mumbled, and sat up, pulling him off the ground, and he sat on my lap. He laid his head down on my shoulder, and cried softly.

It's sad to know that I'm Luke's shoulder to cry on, even though I've probably hurt him the most.

"I didn't want you to see any of that. I'm sorry." He cried. "Shh. It's okay." I whispered. I lifted his head, and pecked his nose. "You're too beautiful for anyone to hit you like that." I said, and placed another kiss on his cheek.

He didn't respond, but just looked down. "You used to hit me like that." He whispered, and I sighed, grabbing his hands. "And now I see how beautiful you really are, and how important you are to me, and now I'll never lay my hands on you like that again." I said, kissing his forehead. He nodded silently, laying his head back on my shoulder.

He wrapped his legs around my waist, scooting closer to me.

"I'm really sorry too." Jack said, and sat beside me on the bed.

"It's okay." Luke said, lightly smiling, lifting his head a little.

It was silent until Luke sat all the way up. "I forgive you guys, and I really appreciate your apologies. I just can't trust you yet. I'm sorry." He said, and looked at me with a sorrowful expression.

"That's okay Luke." I said, and kissed his forehead.

"I should be mad at you and I should be ignoring you, but you're all I have, besides Calum, but he's with Ashton a lot." He whispered, laying his head down. "Why don't we go get you something to eat?" I asked, and he sat back up. "Michael I can't." He whispered to me, looking up with a pleading look. I frowned, and asked, "Why not?" He looked back down, and sighed. "I want to. Trust me. But I just can't. I've pretty much trained my body to throw up whatever I eat, and my mum has these meal plans for me that i have to follow." He said quietly. "Why do you have to follow them?" I asked, and he scooted off of my lap, and sat beside me. "To be skinny."

I shook my head, and looked at his tiny body. "Luke. No. You're so skinny already. Don't do this to yourself." I said, looping my fingers around his wrist. He pulled his hand away slowly. "I wanna be perfect." He whispered, sitting up criss cross. "You don't have to starve yourself to be perfect, Luke. Who said you weren't perfect?" I asked, and he looked up, tears filling his eyes.

"My mum. You. Jack. Kellin. Alex. Everybody at school, actually." He said, and I sighed, knowing what he said was actually true. I grabbed his tiny hand and held it in mine. "You're perfect enough for me." I whispered, and looked up at him. He smiled a little, and looked back to my lips the way he did before. I didn't hesitate to push my lips on his softly, and caring. He brought his small hands to clutch onto my shirt, and I placed one of my hands on his cheek, and the other on his back. He shook his head, and pulled away.

I looked down at him, but I stayed with my hand on his back, and the other on his cheek. "What's wrong?" I asked. "I should hate you."

"You should, but you don't. Luke it's okay if you like me back, even after what I did. You know I'm sorry about what I did, and I can't say it enough." I said quietly. He nodded, and looked back up at me. "I just can't forget all of the things you said to make me like you. Everything you said that made me feel perfect. You kept me from making myself throw up a few times because you told me how beautiful I was." He whispered. "And I believed it." He said, before hurrying off of my lap, and storming from the room.

"Should I go after him?" I asked, and sighed, with a disappointed look on my face. I turned to Jack who was standing at the doorway. "No. Just leave him alone." He said quietly, and sighed.

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