Painted to Life || Julie and the Phantoms

CHAPTER 7: Like a Brother

MY HEART BREAKS as Luke composes himself and his face heats with embarrassment. He rubs the back of his neck awkwardly.

I've known him since we were seven. Luke shouldn't feel so ashamed to show emotion in front of me. I know everyone has their boundaries, but I never want him to feel like he has to hide his emotions because of teasing.

"Sorry for falling apart on you," he says sheepishly.

"Everyone needs to fall apart every now and then," I reason. "Everyone deserves a moment to fall apart. Sometimes, you'll need a collection of moments. Those moments don't have to define you. Your relationship with your parents isn't permanently broken, Luke. They love you, I know it. They will be waiting for you to return with open arms."

"Without my guitar?" Luke asks, hiding his face with his hands again. "I'm not me without my music. I'm a nobody."

I place a hand on his shoulder.

"Luke, there are qualities that I love about you that have nothing to do with your music," I assure him. "You aren't nothing without music, but you still shouldn't be separated from such an integral part of yourself. I'm sure that Emily and Mitch will see that."

"When, Ash?" Luke bursts, throwing his hands up into the air. In the process, he knocks my arm away. "Tomorrow? Next Thursday? November? Five years from now? I cannot wait that long! I need my parents and my music. Right now, that feels impossible."

I bite my lip. What could I say to make this better?

It's true that his parents want him to follow a more conventional passion and attend college. Luke has never been one for school and it's clear to me by now that it's not his path. The Pattersons have been in denial for a long time. They need to realize that separating their son from his band will hurt him exponentially more than any "better" career would help him.

"Exactly," Luke concludes. "There is nothing to say."

"You could start with 'I love you and I love music'," I suggest. "Maybe---"

"That hasn't worked in the past," Luke cuts me off, dragging a hand through his disheveled hair. He sucks in a deep breath, then adjusts his tone. "Astrid, I know that you care about me and you want to fix me. You want to fix this. It's in your nature to solve problems, I'm just worried that this is a problem that you can't solve. You already have enough to deal with."

"That may be true, but I will never abandon you. I will never be so engulfed by my own pain that am too ignorant to see yours, Luke," I promise. "And if I ever appear to be, please don't hesitate to pull me out. No one should suffer alone, especially with the amazing friend group that we have. We shoulder one another's burdens. We won't let you be crushed, okay?"

Luke is unresponsive. His brown eyes are focused on the ground, blinking hard.

I delicately lift his chin. "Okay?"

He nods.

"Mr. Loman made cheeseburgers for all of us," I say. "I'm sure they'd let you have one. Why don't you come inside and join us?"

"Do they know I'm here?" he asks.

"I said that I saw you through the window," I explain. "Dinner was about to be served and I couldn't just leave."

I wince. Poor choice of words.

"What I mean is that everyone is celebrating our acceptance to the Orpheum," I continue, "you should join us. After all of your hard work, you deserve to take a moment to be proud."

"How can I feel proud when my parents looked at me like I'm a disappointment?"

I frown. "Luke, you are loved and we want you to stay."