Ashyboy, I love you (AshxGary and palletshipping) (BoyxBoy)

Chapter 8: I felt Free

Ash silently walked towards his house, hearing Gary trailing behind him hesitantly, trying to play with Ash's hands while they walked.

The room was deathly quiet, Ash was unable to speak and just blankly stared at his feet, cringing awkwardly.

"No you don't, stop." he finally mumbled weakly, scared to look up. "Stop fucking with me, Gary." he said in a much firmer voice, looking up through his messy hair up at him.

Gary sighed quietly, running a hand through his hair in irritation. "Look, you fucking- look, Ash, I wouldn't lie about this." he said finally, biting his lip nervously.

"I don't care, you're a fucking piece of shit Gary." he growled out, slamming a fist against the wall, completely fed up with the bullshit in his life. "I come back here, I let you fucking have sex with me- I – I let myself fall for you even just a little and this is what you do?" Ash looked away and started to walk over to the couch, sniffling a bit. "I'm not going to take it anymore." he growled angrily.

"I didn't like that girl, okay? Couldn't even fuck her! She wasn't you, and believe me I never thought I'd see the day when a girl had her mouth wrapped so nicely around my cock and I couldn't get hard." Gary said honestly, walking over to sit beside Ash on the couch, hesitantly placing a hand on his thigh.

"For fucks sakes can you please believe me?" he added harshly, looking at the side of Ash's face.

"No, I- you're leaving. We knew this wouldn't have ended well from the beginning, you know?" he sighed quietly, moving his thigh just out of reach. "It's high time you leave."

Gary wasn't going to stand for it, he wasn't just going to let Ash run away from him like he did so many times in his life. "No, I fucking love you." he snapped loudly, grabbing Ash by his shoulders to make him look at him. "Now I wanna know how you feel, tell me."

Ash refused to look at Gary in the eyes as he whispered his reply, lip quivering. "I don't love you." Gary let out a barking laugh and shoved Ash aside. "You know what? If this is how you want to end things that's fine. Honestly, I'll tell grandpa that we hung out and had a great time and you can continue to live your miserable life pining after something you can't have."

That's the last sentence Ash could bare before getting up off the couch and grabbing the arm rest. "S-Stop, please." he begged quietly, "Punishing me isn't going to solve anything." he mumbled softly.

Gary roughly grabbed Ash and pressed their lips together with a growl, knocking Ash's hat off his head. "Fuck. Gary!" he exclaimed, roughly pushing him back. "No- not until we talk about this,"

"What's there to talk about?" he growled, shoving Ash back onto the couch and climbed on top of him pinning him to the couch.

"Kiss me, dammit." he hissed, roughly pressing their lips together again, growling when Ash lied limp underneath him.

Ash let out a soft whine, wrapping his arms around Gary's neck weakly, softly kissing him back.

Gary growled in victory and went to yank at the red hoodie Ash was wearing, tossing it across the room . As soon as the article of clothing came off his body he scooted out of Gary's grasp with a soft whimper, raising his fist up to hit Gary as he could. "Fuck you," he hissed venomously, getting off the couch to gather his jacket off the floor and put it back on.

"Your five minutes is up, I want you to fucking go." and he meant it, for the first time he actually thought that he was completely over Gary. It was an amazing fucking feeling, and it made him grin.

"Why are you smiling, Ash?" he whispered softly, completely in shock. "I thought- I – why?"

Ash slowly walked over to him and shoved him against the front door, grinning up wildly at him, unable to restrain the sexy little giggle that came out. "I realized I have all the power right now, you just realized what you're about to lose and now you want it."

Gary stared blankly down at him, not daring to speak- he wanted Ash to continue, no matter how much it would hurt. Ash ran a hand through his messy hair with a sigh, backing up a bit. "Look, I've been an emotional wreck the past few days, okay? You never even bothered to check up on me. Fuck, you didn't even care to fucking call!" he shouted loudly, and yeah, it was the fucking truth. Gary only cared when his little sex toy was about to leave him, and deep down Ash knew Gary was the one that wanted to abandon him.

"I didn't call because we're not together, Ash. We were fucking, no strings attatched... but then there was, I can't help that I want more."

"You don't fucking get it." Ash mumbled calmly, and it took every bit of niceness in his body to actually not try to beat the fuck out of Gary, he was just not in the mood for this drama right now.

"Then help me get it, because I know you're into me." It was the truth, they both knew Ash saying anything else would be a total lie and it pissed him off to no end. "Fine, you know what? I do- I love you, but I don't want to be with you."

Another lie, a lie that he was sure Gary would actually believe- it was partly true at least and that was okay with Ash. He was okay with lying to someone he loved for his mental health. Gary's toxic and anyone who has ever been in some form of a relationship with him knows it.

"Are you still mad about the girl? I already told you I couldn't fuck her." Ash was going to fucking cry and he knew it as soon as Gary finished talking, he sniffled a bit and looked up into his eyes. "That's not the point," he said, voice thick with tears. "you still tried, you – you went for someone else.. you couldn't even attempt to make things better."

"You're right." he sighed, slowly lifting a hand up to wipe at Ash's eyes lovingly. "I fucked up, doesn't change the fact that I do love you, believe it or not." Ding ding, his bullshit meter was going off once again and Ash jerked his face away.

"It's too late, please, please, please go." he begged softly, curling up on the couch facing away from Gary.

"I don't ever want to see you again," Lie, lie, lie.

"Okay, alright- can I just have a goodbye kiss?" Gary whispered shakily, stepping towards the couch to kneel beside it, gently rubbing Ash's back. "I'll be out of your life in a couple of days, I promise."

Ash turned over to his side and blinked up at Gary, licking his lips cutely before pulling him down for a kiss. "Ash, sweetie, how was your day with Brock- oh my-"

Ash quickly shoved Gary back and blinked up nervously at his mom, his cheeks hot and red. "Uh- um, it was great.." he mumbled softly, "It's late, shouldn't you be sleeping?"

She watched Ash adjust on the couch and pat the cushion beside him for Gary to sit down before she spoke again. "What is going on here? Are you two dating now?"

"No!" Ash shouted quickly. "No, no, Gary was just leaving." he said again, and fuck if Gary didn't get off the couch in the next five seconds he was going to rip his throat out with his bare hands. "Actually, I was just confessing my undying love for Ash and getting brutally rejected by him because he's too afraid I'll hurt him." Gary answered quietly, looking over at Ash.

"Which I wouldn't do, at least not on purpose." Did Ash ever mention what a little fucking cunt Gary was most of the time? "I'm gonna leave you two alone," she whispered softly, heading into the kitchen to make them food while trying not to listen in on their conversation.

"I can't believe you just said that to my mom, Gary." he hissed softly, sitting up slowly to look at him with wide eyes. "That was cute,"

Gary rolled his eyes and looked over at Ash with the cockiest face he could muster at the moment, grinning cutely. "Yeah? Does that mean I'm all forgiven? I want you, I mean it."

Ash hesitantly leaned over to shyly press their lips together, hand sliding into Gary's hair to grab at it gently. "Yeah, I'll give you a second chance.. but-" he mumbled against Gary's lips quietly. "You're leaving,"

"I'll come back, we can write to each other, now shut the fuck up for once and kiss me." Gary pulled Ash onto his lap and wrapped his arms around his waist as he roughly kissed him.

It was a small comfort they could get from each other before Gary had to leave and fuck up everything they worked for.