"i will always choose to love you unconditionally." -lalisa manoban.
Her love for me is unconditionally.
Inside those years i have been with her, she chose to love me no matter what may come in her way.
She still loves me even though i am in the arm...
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Lisa|
It's been five days since we came here.
And honestly, i feel so genuinely happy.
because as the days goes by, i knew that she would be there for me.
during the five days i was with her, somehow, even for a little while, she made me feel that i was important and that i was also special to her.
That she loves me, and she made me feel that i also deserved to experience being the first option.
When jongin entered her life, i knew in that moment that i'll never be the first option, but always will be the second one.
And, it hurts so much.
Because i really want to be the first person who can able to shout that she's mine, i want to be that first person who'll hold a special place in her heart.
But that will never happen. Because even though i want to spend the rest of my life with her, if she'll ever loves me back, i know i still have to leave her.
even if the world turned upside down, i can't stay with her forever, even if i wanted to.
And even though my dream is to be that person who will marry her at the altar,
even if it hurts too much,
i know she will be married with someone who's not me.
"are you still going to continue your plan?"
i smiled when i heard ji eun's voice.
honestly, even though the first thing she'll going to ask is about my plan, i miss her so much. I remember that our last conversation was the time i was in the hospital.
I understand why she wasn't able to call me during the five days we were here, because she respects my time with jennie.
and i am very grateful to ji eun for that.
I know ji eun likes me, but here she is, choosing to be selfless because she knows jennie is my happiness.
She knows that i will be happy when i'm with the person i love.
So she doesn't have to worry, because i'm with the person who gives me a reason to be happy after all.
That even if jennie hurts me, even if she breaks my heart, she'll be the person who will going to rebuilt it again and make me happy more than i deserve.
"you know that i need to continue the plan, ji eun." i muttered.
with a heavy sigh, i sat on the side of our bed while the phone was still in my ear.
I know jennie is trying her best to make me happy and make me feel that she really loves me. that she regrets what she has done before.
I can see the efforts she's making for me. but i can’t help but to think that maybe it's because of the guilt and her being afraid is the reason why she does all of this for me.
