Less Than Perfect

{16} Some Things Never Change

Tanwir Sarker

When my sister said they were ready, she forgot to mention the details of what they were ready for. That left me looking like an absolute fool fumbling for the reason for my visit. 

They were having a heart to heart, and I ruined it by knocking on their door. 

It wasn't long until her family dragged us into the home, giving their hospitality and kindness. In front of me was a wide variety of assorted nuts and chickpeas paired with samosas. Though it all looked delicious, I didn't have a stomach to eat anything when I was consumed with nerves. 

It was Kanza's father who broke the small chatter, maple eyes still weary from whatever discussion they were having before I arrived. "What brings you all here today?" he asked with a small smile. "It's been ages since we've seen your family."

My father chuckled, taking a sip of his tea. "Yes, we apologize for that. We've been too distracted by the newest member of our family," he said, gesturing to the baby in Damon's arms. 

"Oh, of course!" exclaimed Kanza's mother, beaming at Damon and Yusuf. "You must be overjoyed at having a newborn in the family again. I remember how peaceful that time is."

Damon raised a brow at her, scoffing. "Peaceful? I think my ears need a lifetime to recover from the late night crying," he grumbled.

Kanza's father tried to hide his smile. "Wait until he becomes a teenager," he said, clapping a hand on Sami's shoulder. "Their mood swings will make you wish for the crying nights." 

At this, everyone erupted in laughter, the previous tension slowly dissipating from the room. It was strange how a simple trip down the path of nostalgia led to a wave of euphoria. The past held dark secrets, painful memories, and often a strife too deep to bear, but the past was also filled with some of the brightest stars in one's life, full of merriment and joy, times that would forever be embedded into our minds as we aged. 

We only gave the dark thoughts more respect than they deserved.

Once the laughter had ceased, I knew now was a good time to bring up the proposal. From the way Kanza fidgeted with her sleeves, biting her lip in nervousness, I knew neither of us had any idea how her family might react. 

I cleared my throat. "I guess you might be wondering why we've come so unannounced," I lightly joked when all eyes returned to me. This was less scary in my head. I inhaled a deep breath, giving myself a vote for confidence. "I came to ask for Kanza's hand in marriage."

There. I said it. 

A sudden quiet was instilled into the group, but there was no surprise there. Kanza's father merely sighed in response as if expecting the proposal. Adnan, Omar, and Sami were staring at me with wide eyes, glancing between their parents and I. 

My palms felt clammy, my collar suddenly too constricting for my neck. I loosened the tie I wore, allowing some air to breathe through the heat that overwhelmed me. I prepared a speech to prove that I could be the husband Kanza needed me to be, yet my mouth felt dry as if the words were pushed out by a storm. 

Ya Allah, please let her parents accept me. 

I didn't tell my parents all the details about Kanza's incident with Dayyan, mostly because it was not my life to share. That was a deeply personal assault on her, and I would not invade her privacy by telling others, especially when the details were too painful for her to recount. 

After what felt like hours, her father cleared his throat. "Marriage proposal?" he repeated, looking over at Kanza. Before she could speak, he held a hand to stop her. "It's okay, Kanza. Let's hear him out."