Hey, hello.
You guys missed me?
It's okay if you haven't, because i did not really miss this. But since i have nothing to do (majorly caused by covid-19), i wanted to update my so called diary.
I think, many won't be surprised if i say that lately i have been feeling kind of lonely. Even though i have everything my heart could desire. Because of the coronavirus, I can't see any of my friends, but even better I've become scared of the future, my future. I am appreciated as a very intelligent and ambitious person, but since I am in my senior year, and the pressure of the final exams is approaching, I feel as if I'm beginning a losing battle. I am totally aware that most probably my nerves and fears are making me insecure, because not to be rude , but I am smart enough to reach my goals.
As for my friends... or perhaps acquaintances, I feel that I haven't fulfilled my duty as a friend towards them. At least to one of them. But even though I'm trying to fix the mess I put myself into, I have embraced the fact that the person is no longer my friend. I can't say it doesn't hurt, but looking back, there was definitely toxic behaviour.
Speaking of toxic behaviour, yes I'm still in a relationship with the boy from last year. JUST KIDDING. I'm in a happy, healthy relationship, still with him tho :). Though I've had my moments of doubt. I seem to get very jealous sometimes, but only at a certain type of girl. The kind that is touchy touchy and likes to talk about sex with every other person. The kind that's actually kind to you, but somehow still very secretive. Now i know that my boyfriend would never cheat on me... he's crazy about me anyways. But the feeling, that she, or they, are hiding something makes me very pissed (especially when I've drunk too much).
Anyway, friendship is going steady yet at some sights less good. Relationship is going very steady and looking forward, but itchy because of two crazy annoying girls. And school is going alright but brings a lot of stress along.
Hope you guys enjoy a piece of my life. And see you in a bit (half a year/a year)
