Beta not Omega

Confessions

Lance's POV

"Erm...hey Keith." I say awkwardly. 'Is that really the best you could come up with Lance?!' I yell to myself.

Keith spoke softly in reply to me "Hey Lance, are you feeling a little better now?" All I could do was nod, my eyes still unable to meet his fully.

"Listen Lance, I know you probably won't forgive me for doing that to you, I just couldn't stand you hurting like that. I hope I can earn your forgiveness for forcing you into O-space." Keith spoke so softly and gently towards me, it's still so foreign being spoken to in such a loving & caring tone, especially from him.

But he's got nothing to apologise for, my stupid emotions and triggers were forcing me to become uncontrollable from the shear panic and anxiety. "Keith you don't have to apologise, if anything I should thank you." My eyes finally looking up to meet his amazing indigo coloured orbs looking at me so longingly. "I shouldn't have let myself get to that point and you shouldn't have to deal with it, so thank you for being there for me." I could feel how red my face was burning with embarrassment.

I couldn't believe it when a small smile graced the usual moody face of Keith, I felt my heart start to beat that little bit faster, that sense of longing flowing over me as we kept our eyes locked. "You really are beautiful you know Lance."

I instantly hid behind my hands, how can he such things with a straight face and to me of all people?! I know I'm getting my foolish hopes up praying that he might actually just care about me but I've been alone for so, so long. Having this new little fire spark up in me feels like a lifeline that I'll never get again, like it is the only thing that will keep me going.

"I don't understand why're your now being so nice to me? I know we did...that. But you've always been distant and hateful towards me, that's why I know this can't be right and is a trick." Turning my face way, eyes downcast. It has to be a trick.

Keith's POV

'I've got a lot of work to do to make sure this boy knows how much I'm going to love him, it feels ridiculously quick but when instinct and sense tell you otherwise you know when you've found 'the one.'

"No trick, just an Alpha's stupidity. I've never hated you Lance not for one second, I was just so frustrated that I couldn't read or understand you. As you wore scent blocker I couldn't understand or read you when you use to be more boisterous, and then I got even more frustrated that you started to mature and get more serious and I still couldn't smell your scent to try and read you, I wanted to know how and why you changed so suddenly. I kept feeling this pull towards you but could never understand why, well not until I realised what your amazing scent smelt like. And it wasn't just because you were in heat, finally it made sense, why I was drawn towards you and got so annoyed and frustrated, why I wanted to know more about you, I knew as soon as I could take in your amazing scent that you're my destined mate."

I watched Lance's face as he was trying to process everything I just said, he looked so adorable but confused and worried all at the same time. I need there to be no mistake of my feelings.

"I know this might be a lot for you to take in Lance but I want you to understand and believe everything I am saying to you. You are my Omega, I can feel it with every fibre of my being and I'm not saying this because we had sex, stupidly amazing long hot sex." I can feel my own face blushing. "But because we are destined to be with each other, I can't explain it fully I just know that you're my one and that's it. All I want and need is you with your beautiful deep blue eyes, those cute freckles dancing over your face, gorgeous brown locks, stunning body and don't get started how adorable you look now that I can see you wearing your glasses. You're perfection to me and I will spend the rest of my life convincing you that this is the truth."

That's it. I just confessed and spilled my heart out, I don't think I've ever let anywhere near that amount of emotion out of me in my entire life, but with Lance It's different. It's everything.

Lance's POV

I stared at Keith trying to find any tiny hint that he is lying to me, that he is just saying all of this out of some stupid pity or obligation. I must've stared at him for almost 10 minutes, Keith didn't look away, keeping his eyes fixated on me and not once did his scent ever stop trying to comfort me. 'Could...could I really really be allowed this chance? Could my old family really have been wrong about me? About everything?!'

I turned away and tried to form my next words carefully, Keith's is being so good to me I need to make sure he knows everything, absolutely everything before he even thinks for one second I really am his 'one'.

"Keith, I'm going to explain my past and my feelings but please promise you won't interrupt, but I will understand if you want to take back everything you just said." My eyes slowly met his.

"Lance, I meant every wo.."

"Do you promise?" I need to know so I can let this all out.

Keith returned to his stern steeled look. "I promise." A small smile graced my lips before I took a long deep breath preparing myself to talk and for whatever outcome.

"My family never wanted an Omega, so when I presented as one I was left with 2 options, leave or become another Beta in the family, the choice was obvious, I couldn't loose my family. I switched schools, went on suppressants and did everything I was told to look like a good Beta. I cooked, cleaned, washed, tidied for the entire family, I was the main career to my younger siblings, although that was the only thing I enjoyed until they learned from my older siblings how to 'properly' treat me." But still a little half smile crossed my lips.

"I wasn't exactly happy but I was home and with my family, but it wasn't the same. With everyone just in the family knowing my true nature their attitudes and actions changed, first with my parents, spoken down to, disregarded, unappreciated, unloved, trodden over, used and then abused. Then my siblings started to learn from them and do the same, I think a part of me died that I'll never get back back then but it also lit a small fire to escape. That's why I studied ridiculously hard to pass the entrance exams for the Garrison, 'another McClain that made it in', was a great cover for my Beta existence and made the family proud, if they even could feel that way towards me anymore. I was so happy to have moved into the dorms, there I was finally away from everybody but it got harder in other ways."

A deep sigh left my body, I could feel myself trembling actually speaking any of these words out loud. I took another deep breath, still unable to look over at Keith, and continued.

"In school I had taken on the persona of being a boisterous, loud confident Beta to help fit my parents desired idea of what I should be like. I had perfected it so well that I didn't know how to be any other way, so when it came to Garrison discipline I wasn't prepared on how to deal with it, I just carried on as my normal 'self' cause I had no idea how to be any other way than what my family found 'acceptable'. This got worse when you left, I was bumped up to fighter and it got even more strict. I think I skipped most of my meals back then and lost a lot of sleep trying to learn to adapt and change without breaking the appearance of being a Beta, and not long after that we got slung into space! I suppose you know the rest since you was, well you know, slung out too."

I may have left out some of the details but I don't think I'm ready to speak about them yet, telling Keith this much is stupidly dangerous but I think now he will understand that he is wasting his time, I am and forever will be a failed Beta and an unworthy Omega. Hope or not, I'm damaged goods and who wants something that's broken?

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Sorry it's been so long! Hope you enjoy this chapter.

And thank you so so much for everyone's votes and comments!!
Literally can't how many reads I have on this now like 11k! That's insane!
So huge thank you to you all for even looking at my story, honestly drives me to write more and means everything.

Kiki xXx