What is love

Chapter 9

Mya

He never even showed or answered his phone...

I don't have any of my things so I can't call him

I can't even think right now he just came back into my life and now he's leaving me all alone by myself once again. I don't think I can keep forgiving him for leaving me over and over again.

Maybe I'm just over thinking but he's my brother my big brother at that he's supposed to protect me but he keeps leaving me

He forgot all about me he was never going to come back and get me from that hell whole and he knows it and I know it

He thought he was better off without me and I can't even come to terms that's the way he things

After the night our mom kicked him out the look in his eyes told me everything I needed to know and I don't even want to think about the way he looked at me before he went out that door

I'll never forgive him for leaving me or at least not even checking up on me

I heard he's some big time drug dealer and that he has the money, the cars, the fancy house EVERYTHING but he didn't have me...his sister

The one he always promised to protect after our mom started to drink and do drugs and beat us night after night

Thinking about this just makes me want to break down and cry because he was the only person who I truly thought loved me

And I was wrong

It's just we could have went through the battles together of getting on our feet I would have taken being homeless than being raped every night for drugs for my mom

All the trauma that caused me will stay with me forever

And I can't but say I still love my mom because know that's not her

She used to be so beautiful and such a nice women

We were her kids she was supposed to be strong and make sure her kids were good since she was our only parent then

Never will I ever turn out like her EVER

And I really thought I found a friend

I didn't feel lonely for once

And it was all a lie

I can't believe I wanted to open up to her about my past and what was going on

But I guess that was my karma for trying to sleep with her boyfriend

Karma truly is a bitch