♩Day #98: M a g a z i n e & M u s i c puns
♫As fans of Axl and Slash, Pat and Rhain's favourite rock band is Puns 'n' Groanses.
♫All of Pearl Jam's decisions are to be approved by Eddie Vetter.
♫Vanity Fare is too expensive.
♫In the Middle Ages men read A Squire magazine.
♫The periodical dedicated to exploding volcanoes was known as Mad Magma Zine.
♫When Cosmo raised its newsstand price,
♪did they call it Cost mo'?
♫How do you test a gangsta's intelligence?
♪He reads G.Q.
♫Which mag is obsessed with the personal lives of celebrities?
♪Peephole.
♫Hear about that hardcore pottery mag, Clayboy?
♪I'd kiln to have one of their models!
♫A spicy read?
♪Thyme.
♫This mag chronicled executions?
♪Nooseweek.
♫" ungulate medicine?
♪Gnusweek.
♫" bad pornography?
♪Nudesweak.
♫Which mag is about palpating your own urine?
♪Feelin Stream.
♫Which band is raising a stink?
♪New Odour.
♫What band do farmers play when their opium crop fails?
♪Skinny Poppy!
♫Which band was inspired by puffy toy animals?
♪Nerf-fauna.
♫What's a Scotsman's favourite U2 song?
♪'With or Without Ewe'.
♫Man cannot live on bread alone?
♪Au contraire! As the Beatles sang, 'All You Need Is Loaf'.
♫Which Beatle was communist?
♪John Lenin.
♫Which songstress got a ligament transplant from rocker Cocker?
♪Joe-knee Mitchell!
♫Which folksinger was an oil baron?
♪Bob Drillin'.
♫" was hung up on actress Bancroft?
♪Bob Dial-Anne.
♫" killed his internet server?
♪Bob Die-LAN.
♫" loved colourful wool sweaters?
♪Bob Dye-lamb.
♫Which rocker gave up a career as a chicken trainer?
♪Jimi Hentricks!
♫Who's famous for his sugary ballads?
♪Bon-bon Jovi!
♫REM's popular hit about facing your inner heart of darkness?
♪'Everybody Kurtz'.
♫Which artist has been prostrate since childhood?
♪Kneel Young.
♫Can the singer of Purple Rain really boogie?
♪Who - Prance?
♫Which diva's a target for media muckrakers?
♪Mudonher!
♫Which Beatle was hounded by puck bunnies during his stellar hockey career?
♪Rink-ho Starr!
♫Which band is horny?
♪The Sax Pistols!
♫Which 60s band was implicated in terrorism?
♪The Hamas and the Papas!
♫Musical genius?
♪Eminem is no smartie.
♫Which British group jogs in the morning?
♪Dew-ran Dew-ran!
♫Was Boy George a stickler for punctuation?
♪Yes, he wrote Comma-chameleon!
♫What U2 album was a joke?
♪The Josh-ua Tree!
♫Which Beatles album had buzz?
♪Api Road!
♫Which classical composer was lured into a furnace?
♪Ludwig van Bait-oven!
♫You're lucky if the composer of the Hungarian Rhapsody makes your acquaintance -
♪you can add him to your Franz Liszt!
♫Which composer likes to cut wood?
♪Chopin.
♫Who's Salt-N-Pepa's favourite composer?
♪Franz Shoop-ert.
♫Which composer's routine consisted of drinking tea, hacking his lungs out, and then hitting the slopes?
♪Chai-cough-ski!
[that moment when you embarass yourself in front of your crush, and you have no possible way of changing it]
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