Chapter 13

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Haley

Deciding not to watch a movie tonight, we slip into bed beside each other, as we have the last two nights. Only this time, Carter instantly reaches his arm out to pull me into him as we lay facing one another.

After not getting a chance to talk all day, I called Carter while on my way home from school, and he headed over. I was a little surprised when he requested we go to bed without watching a movie as he mentioned he was pretty tired after having been up late talking the last couple of nights. Although I'm still a little shocked by his actions from earlier this morning, I was more than eager to oblige, and I couldn't be more pleased that it seems he wants to pick up right where we left off.

After a couple of minutes, he begins to caress my back. "Are you comfortable?" he whispers.

"Mm hmm," I respond, appreciating his touch.

"You smell good," he whispers, and I feel him shift and his nose touches the top of my head.

"So do you," I assure, as I move to touch my nose to his bare chest. Doing so makes me realize my arms are in the way, so I shift slightly and move one arm to rest on my opposite hip, and the other I drape over his side.

After a moment, he interrupts the silence again to inquire about my first week of classes, seemingly wide awake. I fill him in on the curriculum and some of the people I've met. I ask him how work is going, but he insists it's been challenging.

"It's harder to go in these days, and once I'm there, I can't wait to leave," he announces causally.

"Why's that?" I inquire, genuinely concerned that if he's unhappy he may look to return to Virginia.

"Because all I want to do is hang out with you," he responds, and although it surprises me, it also makes me smile. "Is that not ok?" he asks, when I can't think of a worthy response.

"No it is," I respond instantly. "I just wasn't expecting it," I insist.

"Why not? I've told you I love spending time with you," he reminds.

"I know, I just..." and I take a minute to contemplate whether or not I should draw attention to the fact that we've advanced from hanging out to cuddling. "How did we get here?" I blurt out honestly.

"What do you mean?" he asks, and it's almost frustrating that he refuses to put two and two together to understand what I'm asking.

"How did we go from hanging out to spending the night?" I clarify.

"Does my staying over bother you?" he asks with concern.

"No, that's not what I mean... You just surprise me with your actions," I insist.

"Good surprise or bad?" he asks.

"Good surprise," I assert, and he takes a minute to consider his answer.

"If you're asking me why I decided to take you in my arms last night, then all I can say is... because I wanted to," he confesses. "... But if it makes you uncomfortable, then I'll fight my desire... Even if it means I don't stay the night anymore," he reassures, and his honesty makes me want to be as close to him as possible.

"No, I don't want you to fight anything," I say into his chest at the same time I use my arm to hug him. As if reading my mind, he also hugs me and rolls onto his back, pulling me to rest half my body on him. Almost instantly, it's much more comfortable when I realize the shoulder underneath me was falling asleep.

"Good, then I won't," he assures as he intertwines his fingers with mine, resting our hands on his chest.

We spend another hour or two continuing to talk; sharing more of our secrets, memories, hopes, dreams, and fears. It's as if nothing is off limits during these habitual pre-dawn conversations. With nearly every honest word spoken, we form an invisible bond between us. I've come to learn that we're more alike than I'd initially realized, yet we're still different enough to be individuals. As we spend the remainder of the night wrapped in each other's arms, we've seemingly started something that we can't stop, our feelings leading to desires.

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