A badly written Kalbedo fanfiction

𝙲𝚑𝚊𝚙𝚝𝚎𝚛 𝚅

How strange... Lisa thought to herself as she sat in her office. It was really quite late, but she never seemed to care. She always seemed to stay up really late and be up really early, making some wonder if she even slept at all... But tonight she had a reason for staying late, for she was awaiting the return of the Captain. - Throughout the week Lisa had served as somewhat of emotional support, but not like Sucrose. In fact, she didn't know that the young Alchemist apprentice was involved at all. Lisa simply helped distract him from his emotions in other ways than simply drinking. Perhaps it was sending him on short missions to get missing books, or getting him to read some of her favorite books. She always seemed to have momentarily effective methods of distracting him from the alchemist while still dropping little tips and advice for him to use once ready to speak to him again. - Tonight, he had reached a low. He felt the worst Lisa had seen him feel. Thus, she allowed him to go to the Tavern on one condition; as soon as he finished drinking, he would come back to her so she could make sure he didn't get himself into any trouble. But hours passed and Kaeya was nowhere to be seen. Whether he was drunk at the tavern, or perhaps just forgot to check in with her and is now sleeping, it would be worth it to check. At least for peace of mind. 

It was quiet. - To be fair, everyone was sleeping since it was late. - But quiet enough to make even a librarian feel a bit on edge. She walked slowly and carefully past the multiple rooms and offices, stopping at Kaeyas office. She slowly turned the knob, without opening the door, just to see if it was locked. It wasn't. She knew for a fact that people locked their doors when they slept so perhaps he wasn't sleeping. Then again he could've just been too drunk to lock it.. She slowly opened the door, peeking into the room to find... nothing? the room was empty. Cleaner than usual thanks to Noelle but no sign that he had stepped foot in there at all after leaving her office. She walked around for a little bit, checking any open rooms before stopping at the lab. The door was open, a rare occurrence.  During the day Albedo kept it unlocked unless working on something dangerous, it was only ever at night that he would keep his door locked, not even necessarily because he was sleeping. Lisa would often pass by at night and see light peeking out from the crack of the door. Must be a hardworking person... She took a step inside, looking around. The lab was actually quite messy for such a composed person, he didn't allow Noelle to clean it, saying that she could come across something dangerous and it could badly hurt her. She was careful to not touch anything when looking around until she found shreds of paper on the desk. They looked like very detailed notes... But in a different language. Why would Albedo rip his own work? ...unless it wasn't Albedo who ripped it... She put the papers back down on the table before peeking behind a few bookshelves to an area where Albedo kept his personal things and where he slept. Just as she thought... Not only was Albedo sleeping on the bed, right next to him was Cavalry Captain Kaeya. She smiled, somewhat proud that he had managed to spend a little time with him but that didn't last long. Poor Albedo was practically falling off the bed trying to keep some distance between them. Looked incredibly uncomfortable.

Lisa sighed before carefully walking to Kaeyas side, placing her hand on his mouth to make sure he didn't make any noise and quietly waking him up. Once Kaeya had woken up, she placed a finger over his mouth and gestured towards the sleeping alchemist, before leading him out of the lab and taking him back to his office.  She lead him to the couch, and once he fell asleep again she wrote a note and left it on his desk before leaving back to her office. 

-- 

The next morning  Kaeya woke up, headache as usual but glad to see he was actually in his own office! I mean, after the first incident where he got drunk, he was actually quite glad to find himself in his own room and not in some random person's house. He stood up and stretched before finding a note on his desk.

Rise and shine~ 

Found you last night in Mr. Chief Alchemist's bed ;)
I'm dyinggg to hear the story so do come by my office and tell me~
Haha- I'm kidding. I did find you in his bed but something tells me it WASN'T for the reasons we were all thinking. Get your ass to my office asap

xoxo, Lisa <3

Oh.. well fuck. So he did mess with Albedo. Exactly what he needed... Off to Lisa's office, I guess...

--

Lisa burst out in laughter once Kaeya stepped into her office. "He really can't catch a break of you can he... poor man." Kaeya groaned, not in the mood for her teasing. 

"YEAH. GUESS SO. Are you gonna help me or just sit here and laugh me. I fu-"

"Darling, I'm not just gonna hold your hand and walk you to a relationship with him. You've gotta be responsible. And if I'm correct you seem to be especially good at showing him the opposite of that"

"Please- just... why'd you even call me here? I have wo-"

"Shhhh.. I want to hear the story. Did you rip up his papers?"

"One, I was drunk. I don't really remember anything right now. Two, what papers?"

"He had some-"

"E-Excuse me? M-Miss Lisa?.. I have Mister Albedo's books for you.."

"Speak of the devil. Hey Sucrose, darling, you seem tired. Come take a break and take a seat!"

Sucrose looked at Lisa and then at Kaeya, before 'reluctantly' agreeing and sitting down with them.

"C-Captain Kaeya.. Are you alright? You seemed pretty drunk last night"

"So you heard..."

"You two talk, I need to reorganize that bookshelf over there"

Kaeya looked at her confused but just shrugged it off as Lisa got up and walked to a nearby bookshelf, leaving Sucrose and Kaeya to talk.

"W-Well...I didn't just hear about it... I saw everything as well..."

"You don't say? Well, tell Albedo I'm really sorry for annoying him again. I'll tal-"

"He's really mad... You like.. hugged him.. kissed him.. ripped up his work"

Kaeya choked up hearing this. He did what- 

"I'm sorry, come again? I what- We kiss- Oh god"

"Yeah.. He was upset about that. Made him uncomfortable... I-I mean with all due respect sir. You really don't have a chance with him. I don't even think he swings that way... Y-you've really messed up... But... But I'm sure you can find someone else! After all, I don't really think you're  his type.."

Kaeya didn't say anything as Sucrose spoke. Realizing that perhaps she was right. He had messed up so bad. The best thing he could do was just leave him alone. Lisa came back, holding a plate with three biscuits. 

"Here you go my dears, how about a snack?"

"T-Thank you, Miss Lisa!"

"I'll pass, sorry."

"Oh? Alright. How about you wrap it up and take it Bedo~"

"No. Thank you... I have work to finish."

 Kaeya got up and left, off to his office where he spent most of the rest of the day working. As for Sucrose, she stayed with Lisa for a little while longer, telling her everything she had seen, before leaving as well and going back to work. Lisa remained in her office, ready to finally put her plan into action.

--

QUICK POP IN FROM ANTHONY!!
who is Anthony? 

don't know don't care :)

ahahahahah...🏃‍♀️🏃‍♀️🏃‍♀️

GOT THE SLIME BALLOON AGAIN DHMU