New Heights

Chapter 6

Chapter 6

Nathan ended up taking me to my favourite Chinese restaurant called Mr Mans; he knew how much I loved Chinese and it was nice to just relax after the conference. We spent just under two hours there, I’m pretty sure the waiters wanted to kick us out but couldn’t since we were paying customers.

When we got home we sat on the sofa and watched a repeat of Dad’s Army, it maybe decades of years old but it was still good to watch. “I’m so tempted to look and see if the story has been released yet” I said as I lay on his chest, I knew it had only took place this afternoon but then again gossip spread like a school rumour.

“Are you sure you want to do that?” Nathan asked looking down at me, I thought about it for a few minutes before replying to him. “Yes, I mean we’re going to have to find out what they’re saying at some point right? We might as well look now and get it out of the way”  he thought about it for a minute before nodding, I knew he hated all the mean comments and hate we both got but that was part of the deal when you became famous, whether you liked it or not.

“I’m sure it can’t be that bad” he muttered trying to reason with himself, I nodded and booted up Twitter as I knew it would be the first place the fans would go to gossip. The time it took for my feed and mentions to load I could have walked to Jay’s flat, straightened his curls and jogged back; the internet connection was that slow.

I clicked on ‘connect’ and watched as they all popped up on the screen; it was a kind of deja vu from looking when I first got together with Nathan.  I braced myself as I read the first tweet.

Congrats! I’m so happy for you both; you’re going to make great parents!

Wahoo! Finally a mini TW member!

Baby Sykes in the house!!!

After the first three I began to relax a little bit, I mean they all seemed really supportive and happy for us both. Well, that was until the fourth tweet anyway. I guess everything good does come to an end, this proving that fact. My heart sank when I read the comments.

She’s such a whore!

Why?! Nathan deserved so much better!

Why would anyone want to f*** that?! She’s so ugly!

Nathan must have been on drugs that night or something.

How can she look after a baby!

They’re not even married; was it an ‘accident’ or something?!

I bet she only got pregnant so Nathan would marry her.

After I read the last tweet I couldn’t read anymore. I knew Nathan was looking at them too but they weren’t aimed at him; they loved him. They hated me and they wanted me to feel it. And I did, simple as that. I stood up and ran to the bathroom, I heard the sound of the laptop hitting the floor and Nathan running after me shouting my name, but I ignored him and locked the bathroom door, shutting it behind me when I reached it.

I let a tear escape; I hated feeling worthless and some kind of monster. When you had both good and bad comments you ignored the good, the bad always seemed to overpower them and that’s what happened. The supportive comments were insignificant when the bad made you feel like this.

“Lauren open up, let me in” Nathan banged on the door but I said nothing. By this time tears were streaming down my face and I sat on the toilet trying to hold myself together. “What they said doesn’t mean anything, I love you Lauren” gah! You would think hearing that would make me feel better, but it didn’t. Instead it sent even more tears rolling down my cheeks and soaking the blue fabric I was wearing.