hello? (a mcu wrong number fanfic)

29. loki you didnt

losers
contains: bucky, nat, tony, steve, bruce, sam, clint, wanda, loki, thor, vision, scott, rhodey, strange

strange
it's been a day and no one has explained the whole "mom" thing to me

y/n
here's the short version of an extremely long story
1. i accidentally texted bucky instead of my friend mj
2. i sent him a pie—he cried
3. he introduced me to nat
4. tony hacked my phone and accidentally revealed bucket and nat's identity to me
5. nat adopted me, and here we are

strange
that makes very little sense, thank you

bucky
i did not cry !!

tony
you did

sam
you were sobbing

steve
you cried a lot

bucky
et tu, brute?

loki
that oddly sounds familiar

vision
"et tu, brute?" - julius caesar, circa 44BC

y/n
the salad guy right ?

steve
nope

y/n
close enough

loki
like julius caesar the roman general? dictator of the roman empire ?

strange
yes, that guy

thor
sibling, weren't you on midgard during 44BC?

loki
...i'm just gonna go

tony
oh my god.
you stabbed julius caesar didn't you?

y/n
i just looked it up, shakespeare is the one that wrote that
no one knows if salad man actually said it

loki
playwriter?

y/n
don't tell me you were shakespeare

loki
...

strange
oh dear god.
what else did you do

loki
it's been centuries how could i know what i've done

clint
BAHAHA THIS IS THE BEST THING SINCE SLICED BREAD

loki
i know another thing

bruce
you didn't

loki
i did 😭

y/n
did you know betty white is older than sliced bread?

tony
let's just end this conversation before we learn loki participated in all of earth's history

loki
that's probably a wise decision

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a/n hi, sorry this is such a late update, school's been a lot lately. i have finals coming up and they're assigning a lot of work

anyways, hope you enjoyed, and stay safe <3